genuine word of advise, go to therapy. It can help you process with your emotions and theres gonna be someone who you can let your words out with
Look I'm just gonna say one thing, if the thought of I should leave ever cross your mind towards a person you have or think you have a genuine connection with. Then, this thought crossed your mind for a reason let alone a acomplete thought process and feelings. If that person actually made you feel loved they wouldn't make you reach a point venting online.
I'm sorry you're going through this. I know how painful these feelings are. However, your heart knows exactly what you need to do, and I hope you have the courage to listen to it. If not, then you might be betraying yourself and that'd be infinitely worse
I know this is not really the right place to vent to but I just really need to let it out. I want to leave but I can't, I love him too much. I know many people would probably reply "man js leave" I CAN'T AND YOU WON'T GET IT. I don't even know what to do anymore.. i'm literally crying while typing this.
┗( T﹏T )┛