
Well if you think about it to some people (I’m one of them) when you mess up ur afraid to face the people that you mess up on. This could be because your afraid to think about the consequences of your actions and looking at them makes you realize how horribly you messed up. It’s kid of like PTSD in a way. Also what I like about this is that she changes SLOWLY like she’s struggling with her values. I mean it’s frustrating to see her avoid but habits are hard to get rid of.

If you mess up and you know it, then shouldn't you want to make it right instead? She has completely different response when it comes to her friends. Also when she killed them in her previous life, it's not like she felt bad about it.. she was the "cold hearted knight". She was traumatized because she was killed not because she felt apologetic to her victims.
Anyway, I'm sure this will change in future chapters, but yeah it's frustrating at this point.

yeah but remember she isnt the emotional type. she wasnt connected to those victims so she isnt apologetic but shes also horrified on her own end. she regrets her own actions and not so much the consequences of others and in her standpoint, i believe, the root of the problem is HER and as long as she can improve/change herself, that wont happen to others.
so even though it might seem like shes making it up for her friends, its more like shes changing and bettering herself to prevent those disasters. but idk its just my opinion since this makes the most sense to me considering her actions so far
I don't get why Judith was so terrified of meeting the people he killed before. I'd understand if she was ashamed, but her feelings were more like fear like when she met with Jamal. And then she met with Calipa and was like "I'll protect you guys" after felt so troubled with her guard assignment. Idk it's a weird combination of feelings. She's still holding her "money is everything" value, but now she's doing things right because she doesn't want to die, NOT because she actually learn from her mistakes and reflected. If you know what you did is wrong, you got to own your mistakes, not to avoid it.