What is this I'm going to the depths of hell for this ☠

I feel conflicted at the fact that I respect and adore the person in your profile so much but at the same time he’s what I think the most perfect yaoi bottom and i ship him with his leader so bad… and that idk what they actually have but I’m so invested and i wouldn’t be surprised if they are married or sth like that..
┗( T﹏T )┛