no, ur right. unresolved trauma where one is unable to talk about is not healthy for both the ppl involved. ofc no one is wrong as individuals but it's only right if the fl can be honest with the ml. however, it's natural to have all the fears of getting abandoned and that is exactly why she should seek help bc her boyf doesn't deserve this treatment. the ml has been such a nice and understanding person throughout, so it was alr tiring him out mentally and while he always set clear boundaries with other ppl approaching him, somehow he should've been stern with the other girl, even more so, considering how she kept being clingy and inconsiderate despite knowing he had a gf. it's unlikely he cheated but was very obviously taken advantage of as from the flashback he called out his gfs name. so, its not cheating cus the whole time he thought it was his gf. but true, they don't deserve each other. it's really draining to be with someone who is insecure to the point of not being able to open up to their s/o. and it must be terrible for the fl having grown up in an abusive family and experiencing a shitty relationship in the past only to find out her current boyf also lied to her.
The guy was raped. He was taken advantage of. He never cheated physically or emotionally. But it was wrong for ml to lie to fl about the whole ordeal. But given the circumstances i dont i think i would have believed his innocence if i were in the fl's shoes, bcz she already had a hunch.
Now to FL. Imma be honest and say the ml didnt deserve fl. Im not saying fl is bad, but fl is bad for ml since fl has a lot of repressed trauma. She doesnt talk about it or even take therapy and just keeps bottling them up and it just feeds her trauma and insecurity more. The ml is very kind and tolerable for the fact that he never pushed her or pressed her to open up. But like he said, he had to walk on eggshells around her just so he wouldnt push her buttons. Its mentally exhausting to be around a person who has issues, guys. Especially since shes always pushing him away and theyre living a fake exterior of a life, it was bound to crumble.
The fl never loved him. Fl just went on with the flow and became codependent on him. She never saw a future with him. He was just a shoulder to lean on, but even after staying together for so long, fl didnt consider marriage. Whereas the ml is draining himself always having to negate the thoughts of marriage, children or any kind of future. Hell, he cant even bring it up to her cuz hes scared off triggering her. ML also has dependecy issues but its not as sever as the fl with her already added baggages from her family. Honestly, they are better off with out each other. Fl needs to love and be loved and so does ml. But theyre with the wrong person at the wrong time