I'm bawling

I think what was a dream was him sitting in that chair embracing his younger self. That really hit home for me for I have embraced my younger self that haunted me.
This really is pretty much what happened to me, for I was SA as a kid and I hated myself for most of my life. I thought it was my fault and my fault for not saying anything because my sister became a victim after me.
I hated being a girl whose roll is to be a baby maker according to the cult of Mormonism I was raised in.
I hated being born because I felt like, because of me, my mother couldn't be free. Because of her kids, she couldn't even buy herself a pair of pants.
I still struggle with self esteem issues, but not to the extent of before. I have learned to let go of those passed burdens and now just need to work on my present self and learning to forgive myself for mistakes I presently make.
It's been a hard 31 years for me.