Imo it's not that bad because there's hope in mc and ml relationship.
Don't give up so easily IF you know it's what you want. Isn't that why people do things to get their crush to notice them even if they might not even know who you are? Why can't the same efforts continue after dating? Yes, you should break up if the relationship is not what either you or the other person want but this couple, the mc and ml clearly want each other, so why the hell not?
The two really love each other it's just that ml have mental obstacles that prevent their relationship being open.
Although it's not there yet and they can't go on dates in public yet there's been improvement.
We saw him going out and doing it with ml in a hotel. That's effort on his side to do things for mc because we know he doesn't want anyone to know or suspect he's gay, but he goes out with mc to a hotel - a public place. Two guys going to a motel can be suspicious but he does it anyway. That's not just effort, but also for mc. In that moment although just a small step, he adjusted for mc.
Ml brought mc out on a trip. I know that's a normal thing for couples but doesn't this fact alone show that ml also want this relationship? He didn't end up holding mc hand in the garden of the onsen though because he wasn't ready yet and that's fine. It can be frustrating to you because that's not your standard but mc is happy to wait for him so good for them.
But then when we get to the part where ml held mc's hand as they left the bar. it wasn't visible outside but ml was holding mc's hand inside his pocket. He did that because he knows mc have always wanted to hold hands. And although it was only for a short time, again, that was an adjustment on his part and maybe there will come a time when it wouldn't be an adjustment anymore.
From what I see, your standard is a "perfect healthy relationship" and there's nothing wrong with that, people are allowed to have their own standard, but how are you going to have a healthy relationship when you yourself aren't healthy mentally? When that happens it's natural that there will be compromises but doesn't healthy relationship also need compromises because it's between 2 different people?
What matters the most imo in a relationship is what the couple do when faced with obstacles and imo this couple is doing well so far. Sure it's not perfect but you can't deny that it's not love, it's just a different kind of love where one side needs a little bit of help, like that time koh helped ml check mc in to a hotel where they did it outside of their home.
Imbalance? One side getting more? Not enough? If your love is something that you have to measure then is that really even love to begin with? You just do things for the other person expecting nothing in return just because you love them, and mc is exacting like that. And I already listed above reasons why ml's love is also genuine in his own way.
Your just naturally happy to be with each other, thats why you make an effort to stay together.
And last but not the least:
THEY'RE LITERALLY A NEW COUPLE THEY'RE STILL GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER. Like why give up so easily? If your love is not worth fighting for then is that even love at all?
I wouldn't want a lover like ml irl but that doesn't mean he doesn't deserve to be loved or love others. It's not perfect sure but I believe it will only get better, maybe when ml finally tell his family about his sexuality there will be a big change. he DOES want to tell them afterall. We can see that he's definitely not planning on keeping their relationship a secret forever, he's just not ready YET. Like how some ppl cant say i love you yet but truly loves the other person.
Anyway, these two truly love each other and are willing to communicate and make compromises with each other and that's more than enough.
U said the words right out of my mouth damn
This is why i said you can have your opinions and i can have mine, in my personal experience of relationships and life, when a relationship is as unbalanced as this in terms of sacrifices and respect given, it's never going to end well, and yes i acknowledge that ML and MC's relationship is a new and still in it's early stage, but that doesn't negate the fact that I'm wholly of the opinion that while ML does deserve love, i don't think it should be now, with MC. Yes communication does exist between them, but it is still not a balanced relationship. I genuinely believe that the weight of both MC and ML 's sacrifices and choices are far from what anyone can call a healthy relationship. Im sorry while he is trying, it doesn't mean it's all that effective in making the situation any better. Maybe after ML at least worked on his issues a little bit in the future then this relationship could be more stable and healthy? But truly reading it as it is now is utterly devastating for MC. MC doesn't deserve this imo and that's my whole point. And genuinely i think i can't change my mind on that
So, with all honesty (after a year a rereading the whole thing again.)
I genuinely belive MC should leave his bf.
Sorry not sorry?? And before anyone come after me saying that i can't understand nuance or can't understand people's situations.
Nah, i do. That's all the more reason i hope if this kinda situation is in an irl setting, the partner who's MC in this situation should not be with ML. Yk why? It's not even about being able to be open to PDA or just being out with your sexuality. It's about the actions. Aside from ML being nice at the start of the story to mc ( which was more so him just being a decent human, like saving mc from that whole rape situation), ML has literally done nothing for MC. I'm a 100% believer of a relationship should ALWAYS be something that Adds something into your life, a positive of sorts. When you get with someone and it has done nothing to you positively, (aside from the sex yall) imo that shouldn't be a thing. Like that's a bad relationship. Hv your opinions, but that's mine. Mc as a whole is literally amazing. As we can see, him as a friend? Fantastic. Him as a boyfriend? Fuckibg amazing! He's considerate, thoughtful and amazingly selfless. But ultimately that became his demise because him going along with ML's preferences means letting down his own and my whole being is just screaming to say, bae you don't need this relationship. It could just 100% be physical and it would be ten times better for you. Like ML having trauma and personal preferences has no beef with me. But denying MC even a simple hand holding when there's nobody around??? Is insane. When he knows that's literally one of the omly time MC ever asked him for stuff and it's not even an outrageous ask. Like im sorry. And the whole friend shit is weird asf too. I feel so bad for MC. Like im sorry, you can't do anything to make your significant other more happy with your relationship? Break up with them. If you truly like that person you'd make some effort or you'd end it with them and tell them to move on. Then you can go date people with the same preferences as you. Im not saying people can't have boundaries, im saying if it's the person you love, you can atleast show some care. If you can't? Well seems to me you just don't love them enough. And there's other people out there for you. MC woulda be so happy with just literal dusts of affection and bro gave him. Nothing(literally only sex and physical affection in closed doors and it's genuinely heartbreaking to see) . While MC is constantly sacrificing his own preferences. It's so sad to read.
Wow that's long. I have strong feelings on this. Welp if you disagree? Well don't tell me. Have fun with your opinions.