Normally I am a staunch defender of the abused. I was a victim myself. But in this case, I have to agree with you on that one. Even though it might anger a lot of people.
Even if she was beaten and brainwashed into thinking it was okay for her to be hit, because she loved him, she told her son NOT to fall in love like that, which meant she knew it was destructive. So WHY then, did she not seem to care that her sons got hit by their dad? She was NOT a good mother. She should have gotten them out of there for THEIR sake. Even if she wanted to stay behind. But she wanted them by her side and wanted to be by his side. Thus they had to stay by his side as well. So all she really thought about was herself.
it's a fact that that father is a sick bastard
women shouldn't accept domestic violence in order not to become a divorcee, or in order to protect her family
i think she didn't left the father coz he's the only one working and earning money
If she had a work, she could put him in jail and keep looking after her kids like normal ones
I agree about the money. Of course it would be best if she protected the children and if she went to her brother--but she may have felt that it would be to big a burden on his family and that there was not many long term options for them culturally and economically if they left the man who supported them. Maybe she felt that if she took the abuse, her son would have food, clothes, and a nice school. Then when the son is also abused, she may feel trapped. I feel this may be different than a mom who puts her own needs ahead of the children.
So, while it would be better if the mom had acted, the main problem here is the abuser (and a society that makes it so easy to abuse and so hard to leave with kids).
It's an interesting story though.
Money or safety concerns was never brought up by the mother in this story. She also never showed any desire to leave her husband, matter of fact she defended him to her sons. She never claimed to not love him, she explicitly said she loved him and would do anything for his happiness. She always put him first. I know it is not popular to be against someone who seems to be getting abused but i don't see how we can defend, justify or try to find excuses for someone who doesn't want to be out of a relationship that most of us will do anything to be out of and even worse she allowed her children to also be in situation with her. If she was not a selfish person who placed her desires before the well being of her children she would have done anything for her children well being like even being a burden to her brother. Her brother is a lawyer and it doesn't seems like he is on his brother in law side so he would have defended her if she asked. Her children didn't mind being poor and they didn't want to be around their father so how can we defend her reason for making them stay in that household?
Hmm...let me re-read. I hadn't seen the part about her defending the man and putting his happiness first. Sometimes I skim over parts I find less interesting. I think the problem of being a burden to her brother may be more of a practical concern if the brother's help only lasted a little while. Then again, if a high school kid can find a part-time job, why can't a grown woman find one or two part-time jobs if she can't find good work? I'm not letting her off the hook--I really hadn't read some of what you brought up.
The abuser is most to blame, but if she acted as a accessory or put the abuser ahead of the children, then she is also shitty (but not as shitty as the abuser himself). She is an adult. I can see where society may give her fewer choices than a man, but she is an adult.
We can't defend her. She was being abused and she knew it. She knew it was not the correct kind of love. She knew her children were getting abused as well. She knew the father was calling the younger 'useless' when he's actually quite smart. She knew the father was physically abusing the older son.
I can excuse a woman who loves a man and who believes as long as she is hit and the children isn't then it's ok. But the fact that she allowed her children to be hit, knew that there's something wrong with that kind of love. Has actually instead manipulate the younger son to accept these kind of love. I can't and won't defend her.
Its one thing if the mother put up with the abuse because she loves her husband but it unforgivable that she made her children go through that. The father is an abusive dick but he was right about the mother pretending to be a good mom. she knew what was happening to her children but did nothing to stop it i mean she could have given them to her brother.