Question

YOU DO. even with friends, i would totally inform them my situation and the possibilities of me LEAVING the country (omg it would've been ok at least if it it was a different city because at least they can visit right? no! a whole different country!) so we can spend time as much as possible before i even leave. what he did was very dismissive of her and her feelings!

THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING!! They even say that they haven’t seen each other in a while, she’s worried because of the rumors of him dropping out, SHE reaches out, he texts her, SHE tries to get to him asap, and he just drops this bomb on her like it’s nothing? Bffr. Me personally, I’d just say to take a break or at this point break up because if you can’t trust me enough to tell me when you’re going through something, the relationship’s most definitely not gonna work.

Im not taking his side cause honestly i think it's a shitty move to not tell your gf about something so big, but i can speak as someone who HATES to talk about themselves that i never talk about my problems with anyone, the bigger the problem the less i want to talk about it.
I guess is a coping mechanism, like "as long as i dont talk about it i can pretend it's not real" also, sometimes it feel like talking about it just increases my mental load, cause now im not only worried about my problems i have to deal with how other perseve them, even well meaning questions like are you better know? did you resolve your problems? just create more stress cause what if thing are not ok? what if it never gets better? Now i have to constantly explain why or lie to appease them.

perceive* ffs

Ooh, interesting take!! I see your point about having a hard time talking about your problems since, like you said, you’ll probably have to deal with people asking you all time and that’s probably just gonna get frustrating because you’ll have to keep repeating yourself over and over while also trying to manage the stress the problem’s causing you. Thank you for giving me your pov!!