the stories are always the same, like an abusive household and not being able to love properly,
but most of the time the characters actions are literally what a psychopath would do, so the backstories never excuse them, ( half the time the authors dont even try making a backstory, and diagnose the ml with something )
i think a lot of the time in real life (as someone who had a terrible childhood), you become much more aware of urself and ur actions bc you know how much something affected you. for example, having been in an abusive relationship and then realizing that you are doing something similar. i would say this is a more healthy approach/mentality to have, but a lot of the time these mls/unhealthy characters have no ounce of self awareness nor emotional intelligence, and i think that’s their biggest downfall. and i get the “lonesome, cold ml” trope, but do we HAVE to have non-con/non-con themes when dealing with a person that is supposed to be rooted for, at least partly?
all of this to say, i am one to be on the part of “your broken childhood should be a reason, not an excuse”. you may have qualms/triggers from childhood that you can explore via storylines, but don’t try and excuse actions by just saying “but poor him… little guy got hurt as a kid :(
The thing my psychology teachers once told me applies here "bad childhood explains people's behavior, but it doesn't excuse it". That holds true in most cases. Like yes, I get that your bad behavior has sad origins (every bad behavior does) but the harm caused to me in the present is just as real and my experience is also valid.
By the way " my childhood was bad I'm sorry" is a very well known gaslighting technique.
I would also like to add that human behavior is not deterministic that way. Just because someone has had a bad childhood doesn't mean they have to be bad as well. Human will is very powerful. Humans have control over themselves, unlike animals. And if a person doesn't know that certain behaviours will have certain consequences, then they're emotionally immature and will drag you down with them
I get the nuance of what ur saying but it lwk rubbed me the wrong way when u said Caesar’s behavior is justified because of his tragic backstory. Nothing justifies doing that shit. It EXPLAINS it but it doesn’t justify it. When u say someone is justified to do shit like that it becomes a slippery slope of letting ppl get away with shit.
no
What is with authors giving rapist characters a tragic backstory? And no, a rapist is still a rapist. Just because a character has a tragic backstory doesn't change the fact that they did a crime. I don't care what happened in their past, they chose to rape someone. They are a criminal, and just because they have character development later on isn't going to make me like them. I hate any character who is a fucking rapist, and they can suffer. I don't give a shit
i completely agree!!
Saying someone's traumatic past justifies their current behavior spits in the faces of all the people who have had traumatic pasts and dealt with it properly and did not harm people to feel better. It's a skill issue and it doesn't justify anything.
Agreed. And it’s one thing when they have their diagnosed problem from the jump, like the ML from Love History By Willful Negligence where the ML has an actual physiological disease, but most come later with some bs we’ve never seen before.
Agreed. Our past affects our future, but at some point you becoming self aware of your actions and how wrong they are. No excuse for non-con for SURE.
You said it!!! It’s such a gaslighting move that makes the MC feel like shit if they blame the ML for their tragic past!!
Literally spitting fax And they usually non-con MULTIPLE times. Even if they grovel I still won’t forgive them so easily.
“A skill issue” But you are onto something!!
Sorry, he was the first example that came to mind. A better example is Wooyeon from Love History who has an actual physiological disease that make him unable to actually feel remorse or bad about doing awful things.
No that’s not what I’m saying. I have no issues with your example. I’m just saying that saying that a tragic backstory JUSTIFIES shitty behavior is a really bad way to put it. It doesn’t justify it, it explains it, which are two very different things.
As many of you BL enjoyers (myself included) have seen, Jinx is back! And it’s become strikingly apparent that the author is trying to give the ML a “tragic backstory” to possibly justify his mistreatment of the MC. Now, she’s not the first and WILL NOT be the last to use this troupe. But I pose a serious question.
Does a tragic/sad/or fucked up childhood justify a character mistreating others?
Imo I feel like it depends on the degree of fucked up. Like, Caesar from Rose and Champagne had possibly the most deranged childhoods a character could get and it heavily impact his ability to treat others well because he didn’t know any better. Like, I’d say in that case, it mostly justified his behavior. But if the worst they had was a slightly hard childhood that doesn’t actually affect their psyche like in R&C I don’t think it warrants them treating someone else awfully.
What do y’all think?