The thing is that those who have experienced abusive relationships spend way too long trying to understand why the person is the way that they are, as if knowing will somehow change the situation or provide relief.
The sad truth is that yes although highly abusive individuals become abusive from their own trauma, it is still their choice to continue to act that way as an adult and not seek help.
For those experiencing the abuse, WHY their partners do those things is irrelevant. The only thing that matters is that their partner is not a safe person to be around.
In real human relationships lines indeed become crossed after which a person cannot be redeemed in the eyes of those who were harmed and I think that is why the comments section is the way it is. JJ crossed way too many lines and so the readers have lost empathy.
That being said, I do appreciate a solid realistic backstory. From JJ ‘S behavior earlier in the story, if he was a real person eh almost certainly would have been abused as a child in some way. It makes for a more well rounded story to fill in the gaps although I think I liked it better the way Koogi did it in ks. It’s much darker and probably the most psychologically realistic portrayal I have read in BL.
I KNOW RIGHT?? ppl don’t understand how hard is for A 6 YEAR OLD CHILD to suffer from abuse from his father ( which hits different ) starvingg loneliness being abandoned AND bullied, also how tf do they expect someone who never in their life been cared for and treated nicely to treat other ppl? well no shit he’s gonna be aggressive and defensive,ppl don’t know how much childhood is effective in a persons life and how it builds their whole personality.
I’ve read your whole comment and really respect it you’re such a thoughtful person you’ve literally said all that’s in my head (▰˘◡˘▰)
It’s genuinely disappointing how quick some people are to dismiss a person’s past, especially when that past involves childhood trauma.
We’re talking about someone who, at the age of six, was physically abused by his father, neglected, starved, bullied, and abandoned by his mother. That’s not just a “tough upbringing”—that’s deep, life-altering trauma. And yet, some still respond with, “That doesn’t excuse how he acts.”
No one’s saying it does. But what’s concerning is the complete lack of empathy. The inability or refusal to even try to understand how a child who was never protected, never loved properly, might grow into an adult who struggles to express care in healthy ways.
Jaekyung is flawed, yes. But he's not evil. He’s someone who grew up surviving, not thriving. And when a person grows up believing the world is against them, it’s not surprising they grow defensive, even aggressive. That doesn’t make their behavior right, but it does make it understandable.
You don’t have to excuse him. You don’t even have to like him. But if you can’t find compassion for a child who was failed by everyone around him, that says more about your perspective than it does about his.
Empathy doesn’t mean approval. It means recognizing the humanity in people, especially for those like him who never had a chance.