sobbing
this is one that gets me emotional the most in the story. i mean imagine leaving a will to the youngest of your bunch something that would take his mind from ending his life hoping that your will , will somehow help him see and experience the beauty of being alive. they know he will carry the burden ( survivor's guilt ) forever but they really wanted him to live. ╥﹏╥
and their resolve that he will leave the dungeon alive too. like they know he will not die there also something you'll think about. they know he will leave the place alive. （/TДT)/
I mean he (by his memory) wasn't there when he died. But yeah, his reason for wanting to die was due to the gaps of his memory and not necessarily because being the only survivor. It's hard to explain without spoiling the actual plot twist though but let's just say if we're hurting now, we'll hurt more as we go on. Especially once they're back in the dungeon
I understand that he is guilty for surviving but from his comrades view, he was a victim and not just that he was a child that was pushed to death door with them... he had barely lived his life and his only string (his best friend) died while he watched the light leave his friend's eyes and everyone understood perfectly how he would follow his friend after saving everyone. He tried to sacrifice himself for them so to save a child from that kind of death, they sacrificed themselves while leaving some duty for him to fulfill so he could not take his own life while also giving him time to heal from the trauma because all of those hobbies are exactly what mental patients need to relieve themselves. They wanted him to live, they wanted him to truly live and not just barely alive but living the life that he could not have before and it is so beautiful and heart wrenching