Omg you perfectly explained it
You said it perfectly, my heart breaks for him, and it’s wild to me how badly yujun thinks of him, cause in their relationship in the past it felt as if he was seeing past jihos self defense walls of being an apathetic ass, he was seeing that he’s not actually like that that jiho does love and care and connect wih him etc, but now that he was gone he just went to hating him as if he never knew him/?? Oh pity me oh I’ve been suffering oh he left without a word, my guy it’s enough of the pity party
I’m hella sad for jiho ESPECIALLY if it does actually go in the direction of them being just sex partners and him feeling like it’s the least he can do and the most he deserves
Just looked at the rest of the comments after this and it’s breaking my brain how everyone’s saying “yes use him and throw him away too” like are we reading the same thing, did we not watch the situation jiho is dealing with? Did we not watch him actually love and care for him to his core? How are even the readers acting like “oh he played and tossed him away and never cared and deserves revenge” what the actual fuck
look, they’re both selfish, and with BPD, i’ve been in both of their shoes. but yujun really gets on my nerves. for the entirety of the past 6 years, he was only thinking about himself. how much jiho hurt /him/. how much pain /he/ was in. constantly thinking “what did /i/ do”. never once considering that maybe it wasn’t really to do with him.
the rumours around the school after jiho left were all talking about jiho’s alleged affair with the school nurse, right after jiho came to him physically and emotionally beaten up. he couldn’t put the two and two together to figure out that something bad happened. he never noticed jiho’s absent family situation. all this time it was only about his pain. even now, he doesn’t even really give jiho the chance to talk. he’s just unleashing his own pain onto him, not once wondering if /jiho/ was okay.
jiho on the other hand was assaulted and then had his whole life upended by his father. everyone blamed him, and he believes it’s entirely his fault because he’s inherently broken. so he doesn’t deserve love or care, only pain. yujun’s reaction to seeing him again only cements this fact, and it hurts, because a part of him always hoped that yujun would always love him. yujun’s feelings for him were his solace in painful times, and he hated himself for even having that hope, so now it feels like a punch in the gut.
while it’s definitely not up to yujun to save jiho, nor vice versa, for them to come out of this, yujun is gonna need to be the first to pull his head out of his ass. otherwise what’s gonna happen is that we’ll see a situation akin to that in lover boy — yujun, in all of his rage, will pull jiho into a vengeful relationship, likely along the lines of “let’s just use each other for our bodies”; jiho, who already feels like that’s all he deserves, and looking for release through such self-harm, will agree. they’ll keep hurting themselves and each other more and more until one of them breaks, or until jiho’s father inevitably catches a whiff it, blames jiho again, and sends him away once more.
and the lot of you will just keep saying that’s what jiho deserves.