Am I the only one D:

Honestly I'd prefer if it was like the first round- Gun breaks up with Hinami. B/c even though they clearly love each other- Hinami has not been fair to him by keeping her secrets, and by choosing to not rely on him or trust him as someone that could help. That's my core problem with their relationship- there's no actual trust when it comes to their problems, Gun never revealed Jua to Hinami, she forced her way in to learn of their relationship, and forced them to confront and 'solve' it.

But Gun isn't willing to do the same in reverse (which is fair- that's how normal people are), but it's getting to a point where this isn't bearable anymore. especially considering that Gun isn't uninvolved- Jua fell down the stairs because of SeongHwa, if anyone deserves to beat creepy guy up this time around- it's him- not Hinami's scheming and waiting. They have their drug problem now because of exactly that.

I really do not care for Gun, they both just do not suit each other and just because she starts to pursue him and he reciprocated doesn’t mean she owes it to him to stay together. They both kept secrets, Hanmi isn’t the only one at fault, Gun has a responsibility too. I don’t know why but Gun really frustrates me.

Gun has always felt the most... cardboard of all the characters in this story. Yes, I get that he is supposed to be good, so good that someone like Hamni sees in him what she wishes she were. But Gun doesn’t have that same pull when looking at her. He doesn’t see her physical strength or her dark past as anything to be attracted to neither does he feel a desire to emulate it. I am honestly unsure what he loves about her beyond her persistent pursuit of him.

I’m still wildly uncomfortable at her visiting his brother in hospital without Gun’s knowledge or consent in the beginning to weasel her way into his heart. That’s.. crazy manipulative. Which I think is the point with Hanmi, she’s real, she’s flawed, she’s cunning, she’s determined. She may not be "good" but she will die trying to do what she’s set out to do and that’s what makes her so magnetic and interesting to read. Gun’s interest or character comes from other people, none of it is intrinsically "him." He’s cute or worthy to date because Hanmi decides so. He’s got brother baggage his brother put on him. It’s always an outside source acting on him. Hence the cardboard. He alone isn’t interesting, everyone else around him is.

Moreover, imo, he’s in love with this illusion Hanmi has cobbled together of someone with a different life and when the *full* truth finally comes together, I think his image of her as well as their relationship will shatter. Gun is good, but I don’t think he’d be happy with Hanmi as she actually is. I don’t think he could ever understand all of her because he’s so one dimensional and without... drive/ motivations that come from him and him alone. If he did, he’d get those "ugly" details to her past or character. What I’ve seen to date doesn’t indicate any actual chemistry with the characters as they *actually* are without lies or illusions.

Just my two cents on why this relationship is the least interesting thing in this story. Her cousin, their past, and the budding romance of her two female friends are infinitely more interesting.

Wow, I loved your answer! I think this does encapsulate very well why Gun frustrates me! I think it was very insightful and well written! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, it really brought clarity to the character that is Gun. I just want to ask though, why do you think he chose his brother over Hanmi, what do you think about his and his brother’s relationship? After his brother tortured him so endlessly, I just can’t understand why Gun would still feel guilty?

To me that’s just.. family ties and all the weight that comes with them. Even if you ultimately abandon or "give up" on a family member, part of you hopes there was some sincerity or truth in your interactions, that your long relationship with them wasn’t just pain or manipulation, even if you know that will never happen. It’s a constant process to remind yourself of the truth. Sometimes the truth is too much to bear and you pretend things are fine so your sacrifices on behalf of that person still have meaning.

And.. If I were a fifteen-sixteen year old boy, I’d likely choose my family member over a passing classmate. That’s sixteen years of connection in comparison to months of acquaintance, she was a transfer student who love-bombed him and (let’s be real) stalked him to find out the details of his personal life she wasn’t privy to. She doesn’t have the emotional and mental weight on his decisions a family member would. Even if your brother is a shit, his health is/ was in constant limbo, he could die. Do you want them to die with the guilt of how you treated them on your conscience even if they weren’t worthy of your kindness? How much of this behavior/ torture is them versus them expressing frustration at their powerlessness over their own body and feeling envious of your health and a future they’ll never possess?

I think Gun has struggled to find an identity outside of his brother as well. Hell, both of them define who they are in terms of each other, though his brother is a more compelling character. Gun is the kind, sacrificial brother to a sick sibling (read passive/ outside dependent character). His brother is a physically ill boy overwhelmed with the burden of encroaching death and fear which drives him into an obsessive game with the sibling who has the life he could never lead (read active/ internally motivated character). The only way to quell his envy for Gun and hatred at his own dismal future is to shackle his brother down with him, bind him to the same misery. But the more Gun gives him, the more sacrifices he makes, the more he hates him for being so good when every day is a testament that he is twisting further and further from who he is with his envy. Like a Hanmi, he sees in Gun who he wishes he could but isn’t, and he can’t decide whether to love that or destroy it for reminding him of his inner weakness. It’s messed up.

The best thing for both would likely be separation, but since Gun’s so dependent on others for purpose, if his brother were to die in his absence I think the guilt would eat him alive. So really, things can only get better if the brother changes because he is the active character in this relationship. He needs to either come to terms with his life, with his illness, with his loses or find a new way to define himself outside of those things. He needs to find purpose, something to live for beyond destroying his brother out of contempt that he will never have his life.

Just my opinion on it so far!

Yes he sure need to find a purpose ,something to live for....sure but can hanmi be that purpose or should be beside him on his search of that purpose...because the much I know she is not even a tiny bit honest with gun....she saws him the person what she is not actually is....

Your analysis is always spot on! Thank you so much for your intricate answers! It always brings a new light to the story! I think you have an excellent ability to analyze stories and eloquently lay your thoughts out and that is fantastic! Thanks once again!