Yeah same. I also hate how 90% of the time in yaoi, they're either solid top/ bottom or the bottom wants to top and seme will reject it or try to distract him from the thought. Even tho being reverse is more common in real life (I've heard). It's like the creator's trying to portray that tops think it's unmanly to bottom or something (a lot of straight people and gay guys with internalized homophobia feel like that too).
There's a couple of BL I've read where the top was totally ok with it but the bottom decided they liked bottoming more and that's ok, but don't treat your partner like a kid, saying "oh not now, let's change the subject".
And yeah, I hate unreciprocated BJ's! Not everyone likes oral and that's cool but it's like in manga they're allergic to the concept of mutual pleasure. I find Korean manwhas tend to have a lot better sex scene dynamics (those sex scenes also last chapters tho lol).
It just annoys me when they do these “first time” plots they will always maintain sexual positions and with the uke is always a virgin and always doing more sexually. Unfortunately japan considers a boy a virgin still if he hasn’t performed penile penetrative intercourse. Also why are blowjobs so hard to be reciprocated as well?