Responses
well in suha’s mind he thinks that it is his fault why director park was drugged and was in that kind of situation, so i think this is what led him to say “you can do whatever you want” to somehow pay the price of director being drugged, ykwim?
This whole situation is very complicated. I really hate victim blaming and please tell me if I'm saying something inappropriated but I feel like Suha, in this chapter, struggled to say "no" to Jiwoon. Not only in words but in actions too, so it was misleading. Jiwoon, as drugged, messy and without filters (I mean, he even asked Suha to tell him he's a good boy lol) as he was, couldn't see these details, his partner's hesitance. If we, as readers, didn't know what happened to Suha we'd maybe struggle a bit to understand if he was refusing sex or any new position or if he's afraid of the drug effect or anything. I mean, Jiwoon (even though he was so high and horny kfgnjgn) could understand Suha's words and since Suha had never refused him, Jiwoon kept on going, he was so used of having sex with his lover... I just feel like if Suha had said an assertive "NO!" completely, Jiwoon wouldn't force him at all. (reminder: this is a bl world)
Now, Suha tends to put himself on self-deprecating situations and he's done it many times with red hair douchebag who traumatised him. I don't know why, but he seems to give in to pain... he was clearly not comfortable with having sex with an unwell person and after all that horrible situation he went through, he was totally not in the mood but *he said* "you can do whatever you want" to a very dizzy Jiwoon so he let him, the person who rlly loves him and doesn't want to hurt him at all, "take advantage" of him. Director Park can seem a bit possessive but in fact I think he provides a healthy relationship... he can be jealous/possesive, yes, but in normal amounts... like any person who falls in love for the first time. This whole situation was just really bad to both Suha and Jiwoon imo...