
IVE READ THE RAWS AND IM STUDYING KOREAN PLEASEEE the next eight chapters are going to be a flashback from when sesam first joined heejae’s guild and how over time he fell in love w seyeong at first he approached and kept sticking to him because he was frustrated and annoyed that seyeong was nice to all the other guild members except him, but iirc around the time he got sick before seyeong called the ambulance for him, he started like blushing and kicking his legs and gradually realising he’s in love w him…
+ 42 shows when heejae was abandoned as a child so that’s probably partly why he flipped out so bad when sesam suddenly left even tho he’s still lwk crazy for that… guy has a fear of abandonment
& honestly from the raws i dont think heejae is really the type to lock seyeong up like everyone’s saying, so far he hasn’t done anything crazy like that this guy is honestly pathetic in a loving loser way

OH THANK GAWD…we already had a slow-ish(?) burn going on(at least from seyoung’s side, in which he is furiously denying all feelings for this pretty a**hole who is full of himself—get ‘im seyoung!) i did NOT need there to be more in the way of these two having a mutual, GENUINE romance…like imagine how much longer this story would be stretched if heejae was playing with seyoung as revenge?? like, whoa, role reversal, but what if NOBODY ASKED for that?? seyoung has made it too far with his feelings for you to set things back by confirming his worst fears author-nim! cant just lead us on this far and then snatch the “real relationship” away just as we were about to get there!!
i honestly don't like the direction the story's been taking but anyone calling jiho a whore or slut are completely missing the entire point and not even trying to be subtle about it lol... it's literally laid out flat for you that he doesn't genuinely enjoy what he's doing. he's using sex as a coping mechanism & essentially a form of self harm. it's weird asfk how yall are saying he's "betraying yujun" or "cheating" when they're literally not even dating there and the only person he's betraying is himself. the lack of empathy yall have for victims really makes me sorry for anyone around you that might be struggling in a similar way.
Thanks for writing this. Jiho has some serious issues, he needs help but would probably reject everything. My heart... :'(
Yup Jiho is not enjoying what he is doing and he needs help that is true but I thought he was dating Yujun?
He does but they got seperated
Do you think, he love him?
they did date for a bit in high school but it's been over 2 years since then and they haven't seen each other at all in that time. even if there wasn't an explicit breakup, their relationship is basically dissolved for the time being.
jiho definitely does love yujun, it's just the form it takes is kinda weird & shaky right now cuz in his own words he's someone who "didn't know how to love or be loved", he doesn't know how to properly accept/recognise the full extent of his feelings right now & it'll take a lot of healing to do so. his monologue in chapter 34 puts what he's aware of right now into words. he craves warmth from other people, which i believe is very much influenced by his time together with yujun. his care became the new standard/what jiho would search for to keep his mind off of him & anything bad (lots of that in his life esp with his abusive father), but eventually he realises nothing he receives from other people can completely make up for the absence of yujun from his life. it's specifically yujun himself that he needs.
also personally i think he might have bpd lol as someone who has it myself i can sorta see where his bad thoughts come from most of the time even though he's in a much worse place than i am & therefore more extreme & irrational. i feel like that might be hindering some people from understanding his actions a bit more since they're trying to box him into some kind of criteria that he doesn't fit into in the first place.
there are definitely holes in his character regardless though lol... i'd have no problem if people were focusing on that or how bad the story's pacing has been instead but most of the replies aren't doing that...
Hey, can i ask you something? How did you know that you had BPD? Did you went into a psychologist?
What are the signs that you had it?
I feel sad that he has to go through that kind of life. He may have the wealth, but he's not lucky to have a good parent.
I totally understand him when he saw how Yujun's family is happy. It was very foreign to him. And the older brother of yujun has notice it too.
I think, it's best if the both of them should face their inner demons because it would be tough for both parties to be together with that kind of situation.
If they are for each other, they will be together in the end. But if not, guess that's how life works.
i don't feel like delving into all of that in a mangago comment section i fear lol but it's something i have both discussed with professionals & already done lots of research on by myself prior.
i agree, i wouldn't be mad at all if they only ended up friends at the end as long as it's done well enough (though i doubt that'd happen since this is a BL work) but before that jiho needs to be try being more open and trusting with yujun cuz the way he keeps running away (both physically and emotionally) is only distancing them further (physically... and emotionally). yujun doesn't fully understand why jiho behaves/behaved the way he does/did and kinda can't esp when jiho won't tell him about it, but he stayed with him regardless and stays liking him regardless... i think if jiho manages to push past his fears and really communicate with yujun then he'd be a lot healthier since a lot of his instability is influenced by how much he struggles letting himself lean on someone else despite how badly he needs the support (had virtually none during his developing years so you can guess where that need prob stems from #YoullDieSoonJihosFather)...
Jiho's dad is the type of father that doesn't care about his son's well-being. He only cares about his reputation in Politics.
A type of father that will not change and die with no remorse for the past action he did towards his son.
I wish that the author will give them happiness especially Jiho. Yunjun can protect and love him as long as he can.
I see. I'm sorry for asking.