beta
At Ch 48: Currently reminds me of "Kill the Villainess" in terms of the plot's motivation. The main character simply wants to go home... understandably after living like 54 lives in a hellish world fighting for and losing her loved ones. And then to get her achievement takeb away from her like that is horrifying. She's a strong woman who cuts through the bullshit but is also scarred from the centuries of years she's had to endure through. Pretty surprised she never pursued romance though throughout her 54 "returns" of her previous life / world (maybe she's aro/ace?) So understandably she's pretty confused on how to act on her feelings in this new world. It's so weird becaude I find myself relating a lot to her in the sense that I push away the people near me before they get close in fear of losing them/hurting them due to my own flaws... I definitely have caused myself a lot of isolation (I know, boo hoo for the self inflicted wounds) and it's caused myself to have a lot of mental breakdowns and an unhealthy cycle of an unstable mental state. Lastly, I think I totally ruined a bridge with someone I truly clicked with for the first time in my life. I'd never really felt the cringey romcom infatuation of someone being my light my everything.... but my memories of them are truly glowing and every second I spent with them was full of pure joy which I never felt before... but my fear of the statistics in how unlikely the relationship would survive, my immaturity, the circumstances I am/was in, and fear of ruining that person.. I ended up just drifting away and pushing them away from my life hoping they find someone perfect for them. I wish I could be their someone but... I don't think I would be their perfect match that they deserve. So anyways. Yeah I relate to this story and will def keep up with it.