Sugarhoneyicedtea's feed

After reading just over half the novel (I haven't dropped it just been busy) I'm really looking forward to how things are gonna be portrayed later. Spoilers below
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Ok so biggest one, uke has a mental break, melts down and freaks out that he's seeing a collapsed building on top of himself. Everything's dark, debris everywhere, his legs hurt, and the roof has collapsed despite them being in a hotel room. Semes there and he freaks out because he can see blood pouring from semes head and hes telling him they need to stop the bleeding, but seme isn't bleeding and the hotel isn't collapsed. He ends up needing to be sedated to end the episode he's suffering.
Basically he's seeing what happened irl being superimposed over what he's seeing at that time, which basically confirms that the seme is the senior from outside the book.

Uke self medicates with alcohol to deal with his issues as he finds he doesn't suffer from them when he's drinking. Seme finds out that he's medicating with alcohol and not actual medication, makes him stop and takes him to get proper medication and help, and makes him promise not to drink anymore.
Uke breaks that promise, continues to drink when he's away from seme (few sips usually, but also drinks heavily with friends), hides alcohol around semes house so he can keep drinking.
Seme finds out and loses it cause his biggest thing is dont lie to him or betray him. He drinks all of the alcohol (i think there were 6 bottles total, including a 2 litre water bottle that uke had filled with either vodka or soju idk it didn't specify) and when he's completely drunk off his ass he forces himself on uke but uke doesn't care, just that it hurts more than normal. Seme hates himself the next day and tells uke he shouldn't be okay with what he did and that he shouldn't forgive him just because he loves him, and that he needs to think whether he's actually okay or just because he loves him.