Dinotabbi

Same! It’s not a normal behavior and he never really made up for it. The whole sleeping with his tutor thing is also concerning. Like boy that’s not normal and you were raped by an adult. Not to mention if he was in a relationship with her and had a question about his feelings would he just cheat? Cuz sleeping around to deal with your feelings is a huge red flag. He needs a lot more of a redemption arc.

You sound like you're not grown enough to have this conversation. It's not his fault got raped. A lot of people do stupid shit when they were you especially when they were severely abused. A lot of rape victims like CNC because it helps them regulate their trauma, some even do drugs and some turn into serial killers. Him being a manwhore is him just being manwhore. I was severely abused as I was growing up, albeit I didn't sleep around with people until I graduated in college, I still have emotional issues that makes me self-destructive and suicidal that got me diagnosed with Bipolar 1. You, connecting him sleeping around means he's gonna cheat is the most stupid analogy I have ever read.

To add to that, my husband was literally the same when he was younger. He slept around because he was blamed for his dad's death, his mom spent away all his inheritance and made him severely depressed. He unhealthily coped by sleeping around but I'm not dumb enough to assume he will cheat on me because of his body count. Now, I don't even have to lift a finger because he does everything for me. And to add, as a person who graduated in psychology, don't include yourself in adult discussions that you have no idea about

But here is the thing, it’s not a normal behavior and is a red flag. For someone to be like “I like this person” but then sleep around with other people is a completely different situation from your husband’s and that behavior of your husband dealing with trauma is unhealthy. I hope he got the help he needed and it sounds like he did. I’m glad he is doing better. This story however is different and the ML needs serious therapy and better coping mechanisms. Especially since he was just working through having a crush but instead was groomed by his tutor and slept around saying he cared about the FL but his behavior being a complete red flag in the opposite direction. Rude of you to say I have no right to be a part of this conversation when you know nothing about me.

I am old enough and I’m not blaming him for being raped. His behavior just screams emotional immaturity and the fact that he can say he has feelings for someone but still sleeps around just says if he were in a relationship he can say he likes his partner but cheats on them. I don’t think you understood what I was saying. But also, I’m saying he needs help and needs to work on his mental health. It sounds like your self destructive tendencies are also not good for you but that’s what mental health assistance is for. All I’m saying is he is a red flag that needs to see a therapist not get in a relationship.

Bro your reasoning is all over the place. They didn't see each other as anything but as friends. you're the one jumping to conclusion that he has a crush on her just because of one intimate moment between them. So what if he sleeps around while having a crush? Do you even know the concept of what a relationship is? Both parties must be aware that BOTH ARE TOGETHER. You're assuming that because he thought of her once literally ONCE that way, you think he has a crush on her. You can't even comprehend that he doesn't have a crush on her from the start, he's reacting that way because he was a hormonal teenage boy. It's a red flag if he was sleeping around if they were together, girl, IT'S A CRUSH that she doesn't even know about. You are out of your mind and really don't know what you're talking about.

Do not come at me with that red flag bullshit, warranted he needs therapy with what he's been through and his way of processing his emotions but that shouldn't stop him from sleeping around regardless he has a crush on someone in which he didn't even disclose to his supposed "crush" as long as he's practicing safe sex and gets tested every once in a while. Even a person whether be it a guy or girl will sleep around regardless if they have trauma or whatnot. You really are not grown enough to have this discussion. You're making an entirely different scenario in your head just because you're hung up on him sleeping around while having a "crush". Very dumb as fuck btw

isn't his dad involved in the way he was acting, and not just because of his crush on her? becauze if we're being fr, him having a crush on her and then sleeping around was literally not that related to her. but if we connect it to him being rebellious because of his dad and shit, it kinda all makes sense. not that im justifying his coping mechanism as sleeping around