I think the only way father could be redeemed for me in any way would be if he genuinely never knew about Haeboms existence and that’s why he wasn’t present. If he knew, but didn’t want a child or anything else, sorry I’m not one to forgive parents like that. I also don’t like how Ho started interacting with him, I get that Ho is way too nice for his own good, but I feel like he should be on Haeboms side here and don’t interact with someone who hurt him and he is so clearly conflicted about. Is it because Ho never had a family, that he is gonna support them making up (cause family is family?)? I kinda hope not
Oh but about the "never knew he existed" nonsense. I hate when men are babied. Any occasion you have sex has a chance for pregnancy, condom or not. So there's no reason to not be more careful about who you sleep with and if there are consequences for it.
Oh but about the "never knew he existed" nonsense. I hate when men are babied. Any occasion you have sex has a chance for pregnancy, condom or not. So there's no reason to not be more careful about who you slee... SiamesePen
I disagree with that. There’s a lot of people who sleep around, if it didn’t happen 30 times, if you aren’t told anything, why would you assume that it happened 31st? And if it’s a long term relationship, if you sleep with each other regularly and 99 times it didn’t happen, why would you assume 100th it did? Are you gonna ask “Are you pregnant?” after every time you sleep with your partner? What if they leave you without a word or anything? Yeah, sorry I can’t agree with that. It’s on the mother to communicate something so important, that’s not babying men, that’s holding the other person accountable too. “Be careful who you sleep with” seems a bit slut-shame’y to me and “if there are consequences for it” how would you know if you don’t know they exist? So, I can’t agree. It’s pretty absurd to me to think that way.
Oh but about the "never knew he existed" nonsense. I hate when men are babied. Any occasion you have sex has a chance for pregnancy, condom or not. So there's no reason to not be more careful about who you slee... SiamesePen
I could get behind that if we only talked about unprotected sex, but when you use protection it usually works. There’s no need to assume every time that it didn’t, especially when it always worked in the past. It’s on the other person to communicate it failed, cause otherwise how would they know? That’s a bit unrealistic expectation. People don’t read minds, and asking about it after every single time you do it would probably get annoying really quick for both parties.
I could get behind that if we only talked about unprotected sex, but when you use protection it usually works. There’s no need to assume every time that it didn’t, especially when it always worked in the pa... SJ02
I don't think what I said was that extreme. If you sleep around, you acknowledge that you might end up getting someone pregnant unknowingly. So you as a man are deciding to risk another single family home being created. Or if you're with a partner, the same can happen after the 100th time or the first, so at least double chekcing before breaking ties isn't crazy. It takes two to tango, why is it always on the women to say it and make the difficult decisions (abort, raise alone, share the news)? I'm not sl*shaming, just acknowledging that you can't just act without being responsible for your actions.
I don't think what I said was that extreme. If you sleep around, you acknowledge that you might end up getting someone pregnant unknowingly. So you as a man are deciding to risk another single family home being... SiamesePen
But yeah maybe I'll change my mind, that's just how I see it now.
I don't think what I said was that extreme. If you sleep around, you acknowledge that you might end up getting someone pregnant unknowingly. So you as a man are deciding to risk another single family home being... SiamesePen
I’m not saying it’s alright or fair that women have to make all the difficult decisions, especially if we are talking abortions or raising it alone. However, sharing the news? Absolutely the responsibility of the party that actually knows/finds out about it. Responsibility for one’s actions starts when there is a responsibility to take, if you don’t communicate that then that’s on you too. It is a bit crazy to check out of nowhere if someone is pregnant after every single time you sleep with them. Personally, if my partner did that it would drive me crazy. If that were to happen I would tell them, why keep asking about it if you’re not trying for it? I would feel like he’s purposely looking for that/expecting it, even maybe did smth shady. So uncomfortable.
But yeah maybe I'll change my mind, that's just how I see it now. SiamesePen
I’m not trying to change your mind, I’m just sharing my perspective. In the end everyone has their own values, as long as they don’t hurt anyone then that’s should be respected.
I’m not saying it’s alright or fair that women have to make all the difficult decisions, especially if we are talking abortions or raising it alone. However, sharing the news? Absolutely the responsibility ... SJ02
When it comes to partners I never said you had to check every time. At least when you break ties. Otherwise you're around them anyway and would know eventually. If we remember Ho had a similar situation where he had a kid with someone without knowing and she had to tell him. Unexpected pregnancies happen all the time. It's part of the deal with being sexually active, not an annoying thing to ignore until it comes up.
When it comes to partners I never said you had to check every time. At least when you break ties. Otherwise you're around them anyway and would know eventually. If we remember Ho had a similar situation where h... SiamesePen
Yeah, but that’s why it’s important to know what happened. If they break ties? Still I think the other party should say if such thing happened, but makes more sense to check than in other situations I guess. However, what if she left without a word or broke up just by a text or smth? In this kind of situation (and those happen) he would have no way to know, not even to ask.
Omg yes! That's what I thought too but your comment is much more articulated than mine! I know Ho is a good nice man but... he should still pick his lover over someone who is obviously hurting him at the moment, he shouldn't rush things without letting Haebom decide for himself what he wants to do with his "father"
Yeah, but that’s why it’s important to know what happened. If they break ties? Still I think the other party should say if such thing happened, but makes more sense to check than in other situations I guess... SJ02
Yeah if he physically can't ask or she refuses to test or answer, theres nothing he can do ig.
Omg yes! That's what I thought too but your comment is much more articulated than mine! I know Ho is a good nice man but... he should still pick his lover over someone who is obviously hurting him at the momen... Sachi
I think the only way father could be redeemed for me in any way would be if he genuinely never knew about Haeboms existence and that’s why he wasn’t present. If he knew, but didn’t want a child or anything else, sorry I’m not one to forgive parents like that. I also don’t like how Ho started interacting with him, I get that Ho is way too nice for his own good, but I feel like he should be on Haeboms side here and don’t interact with someone who hurt him and he is so clearly conflicted about. Is it because Ho never had a family, that he is gonna support them making up (cause family is family?)? I kinda hope not
Ye agreed on all fronts
Both Ho and the dad aren't giving enough time for Kwon to digest this. With the dad stalking and Ho interacting with him meanwhile.
Oh but about the "never knew he existed" nonsense. I hate when men are babied. Any occasion you have sex has a chance for pregnancy, condom or not. So there's no reason to not be more careful about who you sleep with and if there are consequences for it.
Agreed.
I disagree with that. There’s a lot of people who sleep around, if it didn’t happen 30 times, if you aren’t told anything, why would you assume that it happened 31st? And if it’s a long term relationship, if you sleep with each other regularly and 99 times it didn’t happen, why would you assume 100th it did? Are you gonna ask “Are you pregnant?” after every time you sleep with your partner? What if they leave you without a word or anything? Yeah, sorry I can’t agree with that. It’s on the mother to communicate something so important, that’s not babying men, that’s holding the other person accountable too.
“Be careful who you sleep with” seems a bit slut-shame’y to me and “if there are consequences for it” how would you know if you don’t know they exist? So, I can’t agree. It’s pretty absurd to me to think that way.
I could get behind that if we only talked about unprotected sex, but when you use protection it usually works. There’s no need to assume every time that it didn’t, especially when it always worked in the past. It’s on the other person to communicate it failed, cause otherwise how would they know? That’s a bit unrealistic expectation. People don’t read minds, and asking about it after every single time you do it would probably get annoying really quick for both parties.
I don't think what I said was that extreme. If you sleep around, you acknowledge that you might end up getting someone pregnant unknowingly. So you as a man are deciding to risk another single family home being created. Or if you're with a partner, the same can happen after the 100th time or the first, so at least double chekcing before breaking ties isn't crazy. It takes two to tango, why is it always on the women to say it and make the difficult decisions (abort, raise alone, share the news)? I'm not sl*shaming, just acknowledging that you can't just act without being responsible for your actions.
But yeah maybe I'll change my mind, that's just how I see it now.
I’m not saying it’s alright or fair that women have to make all the difficult decisions, especially if we are talking abortions or raising it alone. However, sharing the news? Absolutely the responsibility of the party that actually knows/finds out about it. Responsibility for one’s actions starts when there is a responsibility to take, if you don’t communicate that then that’s on you too. It is a bit crazy to check out of nowhere if someone is pregnant after every single time you sleep with them. Personally, if my partner did that it would drive me crazy. If that were to happen I would tell them, why keep asking about it if you’re not trying for it? I would feel like he’s purposely looking for that/expecting it, even maybe did smth shady. So uncomfortable.
I’m not trying to change your mind, I’m just sharing my perspective. In the end everyone has their own values, as long as they don’t hurt anyone then that’s should be respected.
When it comes to partners I never said you had to check every time. At least when you break ties. Otherwise you're around them anyway and would know eventually. If we remember Ho had a similar situation where he had a kid with someone without knowing and she had to tell him. Unexpected pregnancies happen all the time. It's part of the deal with being sexually active, not an annoying thing to ignore until it comes up.
Yeah, but that’s why it’s important to know what happened. If they break ties? Still I think the other party should say if such thing happened, but makes more sense to check than in other situations I guess. However, what if she left without a word or broke up just by a text or smth? In this kind of situation (and those happen) he would have no way to know, not even to ask.
Omg yes! That's what I thought too but your comment is much more articulated than mine! I know Ho is a good nice man but... he should still pick his lover over someone who is obviously hurting him at the moment, he shouldn't rush things without letting Haebom decide for himself what he wants to do with his "father"
Yeah if he physically can't ask or she refuses to test or answer, theres nothing he can do ig.
Yes