the novel is actually so heartbreaking i couldn’t even finish it , it made me feel so sick
i didn’t finish it but basically the ML keeps clinging to MC even though he pulls away and gets very jealous and tracks his every move and MC keeps fighting back but it’s just tiring so he eventually just gives in to placate him so he can lay low until graduation.
The they get into an argument bc ML can tell MC is trying to run away and they say some cruel things to one another, then the ML tells him that he will stop liking him and proceeds to spread rumors about him him being a slut and sleeping with youngjin, it gets really bad ad they beat him up a bit but after some more drama the ML clears his name because he doesn’t want to see him be tormented. this was the mot depressing arc for me because MC starts to lose his mind and really spirals.
They makeup somehow but MC still wants to run away to his mom in germany, ML kinda catches on at some point and loses his mind and even rips up his airport. at this point the MC just wanted to drop out and he was even on medication for the depression he developed. At some point the ML tried to cut himself and threatened to kill himself and MC got upset (because that’s how his dad died.) but after, MC says he wants to join his dad because he can’t join his mom (he found out she is pregnant and has really moved on from him.) ML says he will kill him then kill himself, he tries to choke him but can’t do it and just gives up a promises to get out of his life if he just stays alive.
I stopped reading here because I skipped forward and they just end up together, but i genuinely think the psychological damage inflicted upon the MC was so much worse than any bullying he had experienced in the past. the ML is very unlikable because although he didn’t rape him, he just consistently knocked the MC down and doesn’t care about his happiness. (i think there was some sort of assault but i kinda skipped because it made me queasy)
overall, it was well written and good at depicting depression but the sadness ML inflicted upon MC is just irredeemable and the author should’ve either made them not end up together or not have taken it that far
I know it's just a story but I've been in a similar toxic relationship in real life. They tried to cobtrol my every move, cuting me off from my friends, etc and when I tried to escape they turned my life into a living hell with violence and threats. Finally pushing me to commit su**s*de. It's been 6 years since then.I've been trying to move on all these years, getting professional help and fighting depression. While it's often hard and tiring, I'm doing my best to get better. So, the idea of getting back together at this point would be ridiculously absurd bc nothing can compensate for the mental damage it caused.
:(( honestly this story reminded me of a past friendship i had except my situation was much less extreme, which is why reading about the MCs thoughts made me so emotional. it’s so sad that people don’t understand the gravity of abusive relationships and how harmful it is to simply paint it as a mistake. i’m so proud of you for getting help and i hope you can find your own peace
I hope no one ever has to experience such psychological violence. I made a lot of wrong choices during a particular period in my life, and so many difficult things happened to me. I am a victim of r*pe, and they even used that fact to threaten and emotionally control me. But whatever. I am so glad that I moved on from that relationship. Thank you for your support.










i hate new gens we waited years for lilian and felix’s story and you guys are completely misunderstanding them