ReviewRaptor's manga / #WRITING ISSUES(2)

First of all, the story is VERY interesting and for a change this female lead seems likable and not the typical weird mess we see so often in these stories. XD The art is decent too, but there are some issues that bother me: There are too many random moments (why tf did ML suddenly go to the cafe bar and make a drink for her?? That was WAY out of character) and jump cuts/missed info. Or just things that are full on ignored (like the parents not wanting her to marry an old dude, wanting to check up who he is, but that never happened, they weren't even at the ball). The male lead is a breath of fresh air in terms of design (he made me notice literal all MLs have the same eye type, wtf) and personality, but he still feels a bit shallow. Not as shallow as the villain adoptive son tho. That character feels entirely like he just exists to be the bad guy and his behavior is based on acting to create a moment, not acting as he as a character would and then a moment happening. He's just NOT well written at all and the story makes it clear it doesn't care, he just exists to be hated. And that's not writing I'm fond of. Alongside with the plot-tool type behavior of course. The overarching story is super interesting, but I really hope these flaws don't keep happeneing so much. It throws you off rhythm easily and some stuff is honestly annoying (time skipping after somewhat important moments especially).

My review: https://www.mangago.me/home/mangatopic/19254677/ The overarching story is interesting but the execution in both art and writing has it's issues. The heavy topic of the story as well as the lukewarm ending for the villains isn't my thing a sit played out, but it's still a decent read regardless. Shoowa already showed she has issues with certain parts of writing or randomness when it comes to panels that show things that are just somehow out of place (random expressions especially, without connecting to dialogue or happenings), this is present here alot too. Especially with jumping around, not explaining certain things and just it being left to the reader to just 'deal with it' instead of setting up an explaination. Shoowa really needs to try and get a little more detailed when it comes to these things or set them up differently, since it would enhance her stories alot. The art itself is decent but there are also issues there, mainly the expressions and facial movement that should be there for some expressions. The artist has alot of problems with certain angles and especially the mouth's surrounding skin and muscles look uncanny due to them basically not 'moving' when making expressions. Especially the open mouth panels, front and side view, all look the same. Very 3D-model based without movement of muscles or actual expressions. It's uncanny to look at because this is what you'd see when you take a mannekin or even unalived body and just open their jaw. Much like in a horror movie or such. Which is why the art is often unpleasant to look at. It feels incredibly artificial and 'off'. Pushing many faces into uncanny valley. The artist should really work on that aspect as well as making the fight scenes more impactful. They look quite stiff for some reason. personally not a fan of the artstyle in general for BL. Smut scenes look weird in this shounen style for some reason. But this likely depends on personal taste. The thing I noticed as well is that there is basically no emotions. Maybe alot due to the art issues 8expressions play a key role in this) but overall it just felt bland and emotionless in basically 95% of the comic. And what little emotions did get across where over quick or just too little. This may be a big issue for some readers, others may not care. It depends. Again, the overall story is decent, but the execution has it's issues which made it not as good of a read as I hoped it would be. But this likely depends on what one is used to and knows in terms of art and writing quality, what the personal taste is, etc.. Give it a go, but be prepared for the aforementioned things. I personally am not a fan of it due to the technicalities but maybe you'll like it more. :)