Liked Someone I Shouldn't Like

i'm gonna give you my kinlist, and you're gonna judge me for it lol.
Shinji
Takemichi
Reki
Hu tao
Gojo
Venti
there might be more but they're like my main kins, my highest kins being shinji and hutao

So basically I'm pansexual...
And I can get attracted to any gender/sexuality so I'm wondering...
Is me watching gay porn a big deal?
Cause even before all about how girls shouldn't fetishize gay people
And before I became a fujodan AND knew what LGBTQ+ is I already had a crush on a gay men,a lesbian and even a bisexual and a straight...
I also already watched gay porn before knowing yaoi...
So I'm really wondering if I can watch it?
Cause there's a lot of people telling fujoshis that it's not ok...
I mean I am pansexual an that meand I'm attracted to anybody regardless of gender and sexuality...
Is it just the straight and lesbians thats not allowed?
Or every girls?
(Tho I ain't sure if I'm actually pansexual or omnisexual XD)
Pls tell me what your thoughts are...
Also if there's any gay men that will see this pls do tell me what you think about it