Hating Someone

Ok so I was at a cafe with two of my friends and I was telling them about the arguments that y’all have on this site about fujoshis and how funny it is to read them and my friends being the normies they are asked me what a fujoshi is so I explained to them the history behind it and how it once used as a term to put women down saying they’ll never be married but then they reclaimed that word but now it means someone who fetishizes men. My straight white female friend said that the people putting down the fujoshis are wrong because the term itself was used to oppress women in the first place but now that they’re taking it back people are bashing them again. My gay white male friend said that the people calling themselves fujoshis are wrong because no matter what the term meant in the past it now stands for something that harms the LGBTQ+ community. My swf friend said that the fact that they are trying to change the word back into a word that oppresses women and stop women from using it would be like trying to change the n word back into a word that oppresses black people and stop them from using it. My gwm friend said that this wasn’t true and that she couldn’t really speak on it because she hasn’t been oppressed as a gay male. She said that he couldn’t speak on it because he hasn’t been oppressed as a woman and that he can hide the fact that he’s gay but she can’t die the fact that she’s a woman.

They kept arguing about this for a while and it soon escalated and turned into a conversation about which group was the most oppressed. My swf friend argued that black people are the most oppressed because even today they are still getting persecuted by the police while my gwm friend said that LGBTQ+ members are being persecuted more because there are still countries where people get killed if they are gay. She said that it’s not true because people can hide their sexuality but they can’t hide the color of their skin but he said that it’s not that easy to hide their sexuality.

They couldn’t come to an agreement or agree to disagree so we all decided to go home and they both left feeling pretty pissed and I’m pretty sure they’re not talking to each other rn. I feel like each side expected me to agree with them since I am female, black, and bi but I just didn’t say anything and watched them argue. Honestly, I know I should care because I check all boxes of this argument but I really don’t. I’m already dealing with enough problems. I don’t have the time to sit down and ponder about which part of me society hates most. Plus overall both of their arguments seemed pretty wack. I’m really considering just telling them to fucking get over themselves and that the argument was stupid in the first place but at the same time I feel responsible because I was the one who mentioned the fujoshi thing in the first place. Idk dude. What should I do?

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