should i just ...kill myself

so i have just finished high school which is good bc high school sucks but the thing is i have no future anymore bc my dream is fucking gone(i think that sounds cringeworthy but i don't give a fuck anyway) to top the misery i fuckin repeated my senior year in hope that i will get better grades but just same mistakes same failure i just i just fuckin wanted to go to medical university so bad and it really reallly hurts that i cant anymore ( i know i might sound dramatic but...ugh) you know what really hurts that some people used to get worst grades than me but in the end they geo to medical school and i get to the trash pin.
ha jesus i feel this is just so serious for such site. i mean you know someone is really fucked up when they can't open up only for strangers on the internet and on such sites ( i mean i rlly like mangago but still i mean see my question).
duh properly no one will even bother reading my shit i mean even i wouldn't.