Things happen

In high school I liked this girl a lot, we'll call her Amy. Amy and I are both females and are around the same age, we never spoke much until senior year. We had Yearbook together(a class where you help take pictures for the year book and help make the book's design as well) it was until then we began talking, she'd sit in my seat and force me into her seat and would even doodle in my notebook while I took notes. I found what she was doing really cute, I started to take interest in her. This happened for like a week but I decided to change that class for an advance art class, we didn't see each other much but we had each other's numbers and randomly during lunch she'd text me asking where I was. A few months passed and we were pretty close, I'd skip lunch sometimes just to hang out with her in a classroom and we'd just talk about anime related things or we'd talk about our senior essays, I enjoyed spending time with her. I confessed my love to her one day and she rejects me saying we barely knew each other and should worry about school first, I felt hurt but I understood where she was getting at so we stood as friends. You could say I avoided her since that day but she seemed eager for my attention and even asked me to prom(I didn't go), I regret not going sometimes. After graduation we kept in contact and would text each other daily, I really liked our conversations. I gave it time before I confessed again, I was rejected but she never told me she didn't feel the same way nor did she say she felt the same. A month ago I confronted her and asked why doesn't she tell me to stop or leave her alone and she told me she isn't strong at expressing her feelings, it just pissed me off because she never sounded sincere and just kept repeating herself saying she will try to understand my feelings. She said at one point she liked me but felt weird so she ignored her feelings for me, when I'd say reasons why I liked her she would send me hearts and say she was flattered and such. She is now ignoring me, I'm finally giving up this 1 year battle. I feel stupid for all of this, I just feel I made her uncomfortable because I'm a girl as well. I have self hate and I'm overly apologetic, I've been this way since I was a little girl. This makes me very honest and kind to those closest, even though I have no love for myself I wanted to love someone else in hope that someday they will teach me how to love myself. I know I'm still young and will find someone who will give me the time of day but it's difficult moving on even when things were so obvious, I "loved" her too much.