dumping
i just am lonely. i want a friend who will really stick by me and whom i have a lot of interests with. i hung out w my irls today expecting that somehow itd be fixed but im sitting in my dark bedroom right now still feeling empty and unsatisfied. because of this hole in my life i tried to make online friends - and i did for a few weeks. everyone i met were really cool and so funny and every night we would play video games it was fucking sick. but obviously discord servers arent meant to last forever and none of us talk that much anymore. im just sad about it bc i havent made online friends, friends in general that i connected to that much. i actually thought we couldve been friends for a while, and its stupid bc i dont think that type of feeling was mutual. i feel stupid for missing their friendship in my life bc i did have so much fun. i just am super lonely and im sick of spending time in my own company, i just like talking to people but no one to talk to
this isnt a cry for friends or anything i just hope theres at least one person who gets what im feeling. its pretty isolating as the only person in ur relationships to rlly care ykwim idk maybe i am being overdramatic over online friends
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online friendships are just fickle and most good people aren’t entertaining them bc they’re out doing stuff in the real world, like legit majority of good people who want to talk are just in the same nerdy spaces irl.
unless you play games with necessary comms, it’s lowk rare to be super close online, majority of my irls have had close friends but we all were so focused abt stuff physically to focus on a person we don’t even see or barely hear their voice. there’s js always going to be a disconnect online
I’m dumb I thought the title said diner,
But that’s real I honestly really feel this, I don’t have a lot of friends and the ones I do either don’t share the same hobbies as me or we’re slowly growing apart and don’t have a lot in common anymore. With like my best friend we’re growing apart walking different paths it used to be 50/50 talk multiple times a day it was a good time in my life I really miss and now we never talk anymore and I feel like I’m the only one who try’s in this relationship and is super upset over this
So I kind of get it you’re allowed to feel upset over that you shouldn’t feel stupid over it your feelings are valid it was a good time in your life and it sucks when the feeling of both parties wasn’t mutual, I don’t really have any real advice but I get it
i get it- i feel like i wasted alot of time lurking and not socializing online. its hard to stay in touch w ppl, and you get worried you'll bother them. its good to know ur interests so hopefully you'll know where to start? im trying to be more active online, and being autistic definitely isnt helping but being on here took alot of that pressure off. i think its definitely possible, and i hope it works out for you!!
Literally, I get it.
Making friends is easy but keeping them is so hard.
I actually like being alone but sometimes it’s lonely, n I want someone by side. To laugh n talk abt things I find interesting. I’ve only made genuine connections online, bc everyone in real life is scary n they have lives. Which I don’t fit into. All amazing but I’ve never let someone fully into my life. Cause I’m not at all who they think of me as. I’m pathetic, jealous n not great to be around. Then my persona kicks in, that’s what draws people in, n I can’t be that all the time. Bc it’s just hiding who I really am. A sad loser who doesn’t love herself.
That’s what I feel but I care, for everyone. I love, everyone. And I don’t want anyone to hurt or be in pain. I just hate myself, n that what controls my life. Fear n hatred towards myself. Which gets in the way of making friends.
So, I understand. I’ve been feeling like tht lately, too. It’s sooo fucking lonely, I don’t have anybody either. But I remember the times I did, n I guess connections really just aren’t made to last. Unless likeee u know the person irl. Always ups n downs. I would say you’ll find more, n if your friends irl don’t have any of the same interests. It’s shouldn’t mean much, you both just like different things, having things in common is great but dynamics where you introduce new things to each other is even better to me. Anyways enjoy ya life. 10/10 vent. I relate immensely.