TW bulimia ED
Ignore if you don’t want to be triggered or just tired of people rambling about their shitty lives
I’m a recovering bulimic but I’ve relapsed alittle recently the part that pisses me off most is surprisingly not the health issues but the amount of money I’ve wasted on food just for it to go down the drain ( literally) it’s probably hundreds if not thousands of dollars on garbage foods that I’ve binged on when it could’ve actually gone to something
My New low today purging in a public restroom that’s just disgusting I wasted like 40$ to binge then got sick after when I’m unemployed and about to lose my apartment
Back in the day all my money went to blow instead of food I was a skiier and I didn’t eat when I was on it but when I quit i developed a sugar addiction and my bulimia came back
When will the cycle end I don’t feel normal like at all
Messages
Honestly please don't feel guilty about 'wasting your money', no one ever spends all their money wisely, we're all humans, we get urges at times, sometimes we spend recklessly due to our feelings too, and at times, we too tend to let some food go to water due to forgetting about them and them expiring. In your case, it's health related so even more valid.
Your health here is more important than the food here, do not feel guilty about it. Honestly idk much about how the treatment for Bulimia is, but please do focus on your health and yourself, your health is important than anything else and you are important. Take care
Isn’t it weird the kinda trauma math that occurs when you’re going through it?
People without your health issue waste food all the time, there’s no avoiding it.
So it’s unfair to hold yourself to this impossible standard that no one meets. I totally get the aggravation of thinking you wasted money you could have used on other things.
But you’re thinking about it in a way that is definitely a disservice to yourself.
Food is a necessity, you have to buy it. But in your situation it’s like being mad at yourself for paying for gas just to realize your gas tank has a leak.
Just be kind to yourself babe. If for no other reason than blaming yourself and ruminating on something that couldn’t be helped doesn’t make anything better. I don’t believe you deserve to be tough on yourself like that <3
You’re right I need to not be so hard on myself
I still think food wasting is aggravating regardless but thx luv