i feel so worthless and gay

so basically, i was masturbating like all beautiful women do, and i had brought my dildo out because i thought i was gonna use it. unfortunately, i decided not to. so it was still on my bed under the covers, and before i could get up, my mom came in my room and asked me to help put her jewelry on. apparently, im cognitively impaired, and didn’t say no because i thought it would be suspicious, and she already walked in and closed the door behind her. i could feel the doom impending, but my plebeian brain told me i had a chance to protect my dignity, so i wiped everything off the best i could in this state of urgency (on my pants)(i wash my hands, i just had no other choice)(im sorry). as i was getting up, the dildo fell on the floor with a sound that at that moment felt similar to a bag of sand falling off a building, hopefully the noise was just amplified due to my anxiety, but she looked down regardless. wallahi, my heart never dropped to my ass quicker, i threw that shit under my bed so fast. she didn’t say anything, so im hoping she didn’t see it, but unfortunately it is very penis shaped. i then spent the next three minutes struggling to hook all the jewelry on while trying to pretend like nothing happened. she is muslim, so my only hope now is that years of religious conservatism led her to be unable to recognize a penis that is not human colored and had assumed it was something else. what are the chances that i can convince her it was that large gummy worm from vat19 if it ever comes up? anyways, moral of the story: if your dildo is outside its hiding place, keep it inside of you at all times so no one ever sees it.

probably gonna delete i still want to die