What Makes something

In my opinion for adult participants is, ridiculing people for posting (so what if people don't make sense sometimes), calling people out by name, telling people to shut up, f*ck off, etc., and these are all behaviors I've seen on this board. Maybe the posters are still in grade school though.

I think anything is open for discussion. Sometimes I personally feel that Asami apologists go too far defending Akihito's rape and kidnapping, so I don't participate in those discussions, but maybe others enjoy debating Asami's behavior. Since it is my choice whether or not to participate so I don't get offended. I don't feel attacked when I'm disagreed with because I can usually back myself up with the manga. It's the juvenile actions that get annoying at times.

I agree with you there. :)

Honestly I don't think I could have put it better myself. "Since it is my choice whether to participate or not so I don't get offended." That line right there sums it all up for me too.

Agree with this whole post.

Disagreement that becomes heckling for sport. That is to far.

There is always so much negativity online and I've seen a lot over the years, Youtube is particularly bad but I had even seen someone on the brink of suicide on Tumblr due to online bullying. And that's really screwed up. So it means a lot to me that people don't feel attacked, even from 'shut up' or something. It's just not respectful…You should be able to ignore or reason with a point - not shove abuse down peoples' throats.

My own 'you've gone too far' are personal attacks. Even online my character is everything to me, my principles, moral code, liberal views etc. So if someone accuses me of something (like lying or being a egomaniac) I can't f****g stand it, because I am so tough on myself anyway. Disagree with me on everything - evolution, the meaning of life - hell even Viewfinder!!!!! - But calling me something I ain't makes me go fricken' BANANAS.

I know I can always rely on you and some of the posters here to be hilarious, diplomatic, friendly and welcoming, but talk it out when you feel passionate about something! And we should! But I feel like now I'm in a trolls sights and that is really disheartening as a person in this fandom….

I'm staying anon to answer this because, lately, there has been a troll, or a couple of them, who have multiple accounts which they use to gang up on certain members and down-vote all their comments, topics and replies, post derogatory attacks and destroy their efforts to make friends and find followers. They've attacked a couple of people I respect a lot, including one very sweet girl who wouldn't say an unkind word to anyone. They also do multiple postings of the same opinions worded slightly differently to look like there is consensus where there isn't. It's causing a lot of problems.

I thought there was more than one . I just was not sure of it. Working together? What's the point? sport?

I see people react and run over innocent bystanders in the process. Or who may be innocent? Who knows. Then there are some who like a good brawl and wade right in. If the trolls are doing it for sport, they are probably having a good time. Or it may be political.

The person I mentioned doesn't want to participate in discussions anymore.

Haha, you sound exactly like me. I used to be so active here and everywhere, pretty happy to be out there and talking to people about anything and everything, I'd never say something to anyone on here that I wouldn't in real life (and I mean that honestly, I'm from a confrontational house hold so nearly anything goes with me) but I've had people put words in my mouth and attack my character, like you don't have to like my ideas or whatever that's cool, but that... Omg I have been left SHAKING, I have never been that mad in my life.

It's so disheartening, to the point where I stick to myself and the people I trust because reaching out in this fandom is terrifying. I'm actually glad someone else is open enough to bring this sort of thing up.

Thank you for letting us know this. Shining a light on it gives it a diff. perspective. if anything comes out of this is that people can become more comfortable posting here now that this is known. Romance did a good thing in opening this topic today. Otherwise this info would have not come to light,

I am sorry that happened--but I have to say "Starbelly Sneetches" is a great name.

(⌒▽⌒)

Oh gosh! I am not good with confrontation so yep I totally get that - and you tend to wonder just how it can affect us so much, even though it's online!
I'll try and stick to easy topics from now on though, and I'm going to use a safe word when I need a grown up! ヾ(❀╹◡╹)ﾉ~






P.S. Miss your fics :D

I just want to say, it feels bad when sometimes all you want to express is you disagree because blah, blah, blah but other people take it instead as a declaration of personal war. It also feels bad when people misunderstand your point and comfortably go against you based on that. I like disagreeing because although it's frustrating at times, there are actually instances that it becomes worth it because I get to see another rational person's point of view. To be more general, it only feels bad when people get all irrational on you.
About attacking the person her/himself, I call people annoying when I think they are because I base it on them being irrational or being mean themselves.
So yeah, I guess I'm not the calm, let it be type of person but I don't really like being- yes, I'm going to use that word again- irrational as well.

It's very easy to get carried away in the midst of a debate, but those who go all irrational are either having a bad day (it happens) or are generally angry people to begin with.

And personal attacks, nasty trolling, stalking a commenter and marking everything they post with thumbs down/annoying, etc. are done with the sole intention of hurting some random person(s) they don't know. I wish people would think about that and realize someone like that is really messed up. That person (to put it politely) has problems. No one should permit themselves to be sucked into that. It's a knee-jerk reflex to react to it, but most effective solution is to ignore them completely. Confrontation/acknowledgement only fuels them.

I'm guessing this is about me saying I actually tell irrational and mean people they're annoying. I'm not sure, if you can be bothered, correct me if I'm wrong. I've actually only told someone that once because it was too much for me to ignore. So, yeah, don't worry, I don't intend to carry on after I've told them my honest feelings in those kinds of situations. As for debates, as I've said, I only enjoy those reasonable ones that actually discuss the manga or topics concerning what we've read. One last thing, I personally don't get hurt with nasty trolling, thumbing down, etc. so uhm, yeah, they can't push me out of commenting on other mangas I'll probably want to comment on in the future! (Yay for me!) I can be reminded though when I am being too much or if I'm coming off as mean. If the person don't deserve it (I can mull on that), I'll apologize. As I've said though, I get annoyed. I myself don't want to surrender to fueling the fire but I think I should be able to give them a piece of my mind once and then leave it at that. (I did reply once more to the person that time, I guess I shouldn't have.)
Whew. I've spouted out a mouthful again but I just wanted to be clear on my intentions (although this may not be the best place) lest some people would be too sensitive.
Peace! *in a low voice*

No, this was really for those who become dismayed by attacks on their opinons (which sometimes seem to turn personal). I hate seeing so many people say they don't want to post comments here because of that. Hell, I wish more people would comment! More variety and all that.

I'm glad you're made of tougher stuff and you should be able to speak your mind, but when you give them a piece of your mind, you only encourage them to continue their behavior (I'm talking about those being obvious in their motives... not those who've might have lost it temporarily).

I'm aware I can be clutzy at times. Definitely let me know if I've stepped on your toes. ;)

This isn't aimed at you (because I honestly don't remember "Kin" making personal comments), but it is very human to start to get personally involved in a debate--and in practice there can be little difference between, "This idea is stupid." and "You are stupid." It's always a conundrum when I want to call someone out for doing something that I think is a personal attack when there is no way to do it without singling that person out and attacking back. If I am being reasonable, I remind myself that the only way to get back to talking about the manga is to talk only about the manga (or related topic).

On a bad day, I may give in to my first response to address the person instead of the ideas, or keep arguing past the point where most people
would just let it go. This can be a problem if there is a person with whom you regularly disagree--sometimes that just happens because we each see the world and the manga the way we see it. It's like the debate over the color of this dress:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_dress_%28viral_phenomenon%29

People see what they see, and they can't people other people see something else. Some even looked at those who argue for colors they don't see and think, "Oh right--this person always sees it wrong." and proceed with this in mind. That's actually kind of normal, because this is the type of things people do. We are all human, and all we can do it try not to be a jerk.

The thing is, deep down, everyone secretly believes she is right.

Oh, since it was replied to me so... oh, but I see now how it relates. And I don't really disagree.
"...but when you give them a piece of your mind, you only encourage them to continue their behavior (I'm talking about those being obvious in their motives... not those who've might have lost it temporarily)."
And here, yeah, I see your point. Although I thought you may be able to leave them hanging and then they may eventually cool down, that may not be mostly the case. Just got to clamp up my virtual go-tell-people-off mouth a bit more or something.

Yeah, my bad. Anyway,
"We are all human, and all we can do it try not to be a jerk."
Teehee, I like that. I should be honest, all that I've made a point of here was really more of how I want it to be with myself. My memory is bad and I really couldn't know if I've made some slip-ups. But if you don't remember anything, I guess that's a nice bit of a sign.