I'm super confused

i felt flustered and agitated whatever the thought if he actually does love him or not, but by the end of it i truly felt like he did, sometimes i think love in different people are very confusing even in bad ways which are wrong and manipulating. he took it for granted and only realized after, i think it’s because of the thought that he knows he wouldn’t ever leave and cheat on him maybe left him with a sense of security, i feel like in his thought he only loved the uke but playing around didn’t matter or didn’t bother him cause he has absolutely no feelings for them but only the uke, but people’s sanity only goes so far until you snap, correct me if i sound wrong though :((( that’s just how i see it after reading it

I also feel like the seme really did love the uke. It was just we take thinga for granted when we felt that it would stay forever. If you've read the letter, you'll see how much he loves the uke. How much he regretted everything. How he'd give up everything to be with uke again. How he said its his time to wait for the uke like hkw the uke used tl wait for him.

I cannot hate the seme because i felt how he regrets everything. What is sad is that he was void of seeing the uke. I mean dr ai said he died earlier that the actual death. And its sad how uke, on his last breath, still mouthed words for the seme, even if dr ai is the one by his side. Its like uke took both their hearts to the grave. SCARLER HEART RYEO FEELS.

Also, It is not simply a case of familiarty but true love.
It was like he felt that he has someone to go back home to no matter what he does resulting to playing around. What he didn't know is that uke could not tolerate everything. Seme thought uke would never leave his side and when uke did, thats when reality hits him. He felt so loved to the point that he gets selfish. We can even see him preparing the flowers for uke which xiachen thought was his. But yeah, his cheating would never be justified. I just feel too bad for both the seme. Hope there's a spinoff where uke lived and get to choose properly.

exactly my thoughts haha, sorry y’all i’m bad at explaining things but this!!!! well said <3

OMG YES!!! I didn't want to seme like I was defending him but both of yall I completely agree with

yesss, before replying to the person on top i was afraid to post my comment if people would to go off on me for slightly sounding like i’m defending the seme, but in the end every person has feelings and feels sadness and guilt like a regular person should :(( it doesn’t excuse what he did but i feel a bit sad for him a well

lmao if people was to do that i will defend you. youre not defending him youre just trying to look at his pov, and not being one sided

thank youu ╥﹏╥

Everg person sees a different side of the story. There are some like us who understands the seme's pain. That no matter how trashy hus attitude was, we cant deny the fact that he truly loves the uke. And he is hurting as well.

But there are people who would only see the pain the uke has been through when this story caters the pain of all 3 characters. They just one sidedly choose someone whk is hurting more. Seme changed at the end, though late. But we can't put worda in his mouth that he did not deserve the uke since he was a trash. Because both the seme do deserve the uke.

Maybe thinga wouldve been better if they were a little hobest with another. But im pretty sure that the uke doesnt want the seme back just because of pity that is why he decided to keep his illness a secret till the end from the seme.

Also remember how uke said that if he dies and be reborn as a girl, he'll wait for the doctor but in the end his heart is still with the seme.

Y'know im rereading it again just so I will get over it. But you remember the part before chen got hit by a car, seme said that he'll talk it out with chen so he should go home first (then got hit), that was the part where i hated the seme the most. (well add the parts where he called chen when making out with uke). Bec it shows that somehow he is willing to make ammends with chen even when uke is missing.so idk if i'd still be defending the seme if chen didnt die.

Arghh but when i read till the end, my heart aches for both seme and i cant really hate jiang since he truly loves zhishu. When jiang hugged zhishu before he leaves for contract signing, who would have thought that that would be the last time he'll see zhishu. Last sex. Last hug. Last interaction.

i knowwwww ughhhh ╥﹏╥