I don't think Yashiro really wanted to throw up. He just said that to get Doumeki to stop (I may be wrong)
No I think he really wanted to throw, just look at his face. And he had the same reaction when that yakuza fell in love with him and treated him gently back when he hadn't entered the yakuza yet, he said he felt disgusted and wanted to puke.
I definitely agree with Yashiro not being a "real" masochist. He was raped repeatedly from a young age and sadly, equating sex to pain and violence is the defense mechanism his brain created to protect him. His suffering was so unbearable that he had to believe, somehow, that being abused gave him pleasure otherwise he would have lost his mind.
I think Yashiro's ''throwing up'' means ''I'm not used to kindness, I don't know how to handle it, what if I start getting used to it? I must let people keep hurting me physically, so that I can continue hating others. That way no one will get into my heart, and no one can hurt me mentally''..
Yes!
Spot on. I also think this is what it is. He's trying to reject it because he doesn't want to fall in love. He's scared of that emotion. And he's scared of D's love. Which is completly understandable because of his past. He'll have to slowly heal from his trauma
On point.
I believe Yashiro really meant he was going to throw up. Actually, the throwing up part is where I was really impressed by Yoneda Kou sensei's understanding of human psychology. When psychological tension is too high you actually feel like throwing up, feeling heavy in the chest like when you feel guilty. I believe Yashiro feels guilt and shame for being loved. So glad Doumeki loves Yashiro so tenderly. So heartwarming!
I agree. I also think he's so used to ignoring his feelings that when something good finally happens it makes him sick. Perhaps he is also having a slight panic attack, as he is slowly losing control over his feelings..
Also do you think Yoneda Kou has a degree in psychology or something? She is so talented at portraying emotions through art..
You're right about that. This manga has too much depth for her not to
Ya at the very least she must have done a ton of research and consulting. Kudos to her dedication and love for her job.
Probably, this is the worst feeling Yashiro has felt. I mean this is the first time Yashiro is loved, compared to Kage and that yakuza, both showed kindness to him but this time, it's love, at it's purest form. No fetish, no other intentions. This defense is not only to hate people but to keep hating himself, I think. He thinks he doesn't deserve to be loved --> thanks to Kage for that. Dang. The agony of anticipation, that slow and patient foreplay, he only started to go to his private parts at PAGE 30, licking him from head to toe, doing his dick and ass lastly! If that ain't love then what the hell was that!
Yeah I'm just afraid that when Yashiro gets home he may regret everything and stop this relationship..
"that slow and patient foreplay" yep, Doumeki is the best at domination.. not by inflicting pain, but love <3
Yeah, I also thought, too. Actually, I was anxious that he would run away and reject all of it, well that did happen but Doumeki just wouldn't let him go. Doumeki knows the consequences so I think he's doing is to go all out tonight (was night time?) then just work his way on clinging himself to Yashiro no matter how much he pushes him away. Talk about getting fired and all. BUT I hope Nanahara would rescue the situation, wherein Yashiro would give in, eventually to Nanahara. :)
Haha you think Nanahara is gonna help the Doumeki to get to Yashiro? Maybe, and the other guy that works for Yashiro.. actually now that you say it, I could imagine that Kageyama would too. He has been listening closely every time Doumeki talked about Yashiro.. aww can't wait to read the rest of the manga (▰˘◡˘▰)
Yeah, just to keep Doumeki around Yashiro because there's a big possibility that Yashiro would push Doumeki out of his life but a lot of people liked Doumeki's effect on his life. I think a lot of people would definitely support them together. Only, their relationship would also be Yashiro's weakness, with the power struggle going on. Crap, I'd be crying again if everyone in Y's life is against them separating.
Yashiro is NOT a masochist at all..
I just reread the manga, and now I understand why he is so afraid of Doumeki's touching.
Yashiro fell for Kageyama, because he kept touching him gently and treating him nicely. When he masturbated to Kageyama's crying face, it's because it was so pure, gentle and grateful. However he also knew that Kageyama's touches were not due to love, but because of his fetich, so Yashiro let him do it.
Kageyama's intent was to touch his body, not his soul, therefore Yashiro never felt like he had to 'throw up'. But now Doumeki is only touching Yashiro's body to get to his heart, but Yashiro can't let go of his hate and distrust towards men (or humans in general?)..
I think he only has hardcore SM sex, because he's body has learnt to react like that and because that type of sex keeps him from falling in love with others..