I don't think he meant to be mean, either. But he still knows that she's a nice kid and taking a breath and phrasing things differently--really, he's old enough to know at that moment not to put the blame on her. He made it sound like SHE was doing something WRONG. Sorry, but it's not her fault he was standing there next to her and Yoo Won did the stealth touch.
He had a duty to be nicer, even if it's against his nature not to be blunt. I'm a blunt person, but sometimes, I take the time when I'm talking to someone face to face about serious matters to tone it down, swallow my bluntness, and try to be gentle....cause bad news should not be thrown out like some accusation. THAT was wrong of him.
He spent a lot of time in silence NOT watching the fireworks. I think he could have come up with a nicer way of saying what needed to be said.
He said it like a jerk.
And all that in the end because HEE BUM is responsible for getting close to Jumi--he forced his attentions, time, need, tears, intimate convos--on her. HE did. Not her. He put himself in a position to gain her feelings. So, he has to take responsibility for that. She would never have been between Yoo Won and Hee Bum if he had not made her take that spot.
I love Jumi too, but didn't Hee Bum and Yoo Won go together and she just joined in? It looked like she was third wheeling their date. I don't think she was trying to sabotage them or anything, just that her putting herself in their date was a problem and a choice she shouldn't have made. He wasn't JUST NOW a dick to her, he's been trying to fade out for a while, that is what that whole chapter was about when Jumi went to Hee Bum's room and cried saying "am i no longer of use to you" to which he replied that he'd always be there for her. SHE is the one who is pushing and gave him no choice but to approach the problem directly, he was trying to be just friends.
She called him over, and he went over. If he was gonna be just him and Yoo Won, he could have waved to her and said, "No, I"m fine. Waiting on Yoo."
He went over and stood by her. He did not say to Yoo Won when he showed up, "Oh, come here a sec," and absconded.
And answer me this: Who put Jumi between Hee and Yoo? Who wanted a go-between, reporter, advocate, ally?
Hee Bum PUT HER BETWEEN THEM, and then blames her for being there. That is an asshole thing to say after being the instigator of her placement.
How is it his fault if she grows feelings for him through their interactions? If that was the case then anyone who is friendly with someone who later falls for them needs to "take responsibility" and date them... All Hee Bum did was let his sorrows out on someone, if that person develops feelings for him, that is independent of his intentions. As i said, i think Hee Bum IS taking responsibility for Jumi's feelings, he has been trying to fade out for the last few chapters, that is why Jumi ended up exploding at him in his room saying "once you and Yoo Won are together you have no need for me?", it was because he was avoiding her and i believe it is obviously because he noticed her feelings and was trying to give them some space.
It is, to a degree. IT's very common to develop feelings for people with whom you share intimacies, pain, and time. THat's not to say he could definitely see it coming, but it was a possibility.
But in this case, she didn't do anything one wouldn't do with a friend (invite them over, take a selfie, stand watching fireworks). She wasn't trying to stick her tongue down his throat.
And he did NOT just let out his sorrows. He manipulated, dragged, commandeered, and demanded. And when he showed his vulnerable side, laid his head on her, etc...please, that's the kind of way shoujo couples fall in love. No different.
Now, that he needed to have the talk with her, sure. But this was cruel. He made it seem SHE was the problem. Quite frankly, he shares in this, and most of it is HIS issue, not hers.
Read it again. Yes, he said Yoo Won was coming, but Yoo won wasn't there. He didn't even immediately go to Hee. He sat and drank booze with the two guys before going off to find his guy. And Hee Bum wasn't watching the door. He could have. He could have been facing the door waiting for Yoo Won To appear and then excused himself with, "My date's here. Later."
Putting the blame on Jumi in the manner he did--she was right to get embarrassed and angry and say her own mean comeback. Tit for tat.
Hee Bum is her friend, of course he didn't just say "no, i'm waiting for Yoo Won"... It's only made worse by him knowing how she feels, he feels the need to tip toe around her feelings and just genuinely doesn't want to hurt Jumi. I don't get how you'd say Hee Bum put her there... Also, i believe that Hee Bum gave up on Yoo Won before Yoo Won decided to be nice to Hee Bum after Jumi told him to get along with Hee Bum. In other words, when Hee Bum gave up her role as go-between was over and the three of them were just friends. Not only that, but if she HAD been just friends with Hee Bum her role would've ended the moment Hee Bum and Yoo Won got back together. The reason she is still playing go-between now is because she has feelings for Hee Bum now, she is putting herself near him herself, not Hee Bum. Jumi is taking advantage of her role as go-between to stay close to Hee Bum and Hee Bum is trying to stay friends.
By take responsiblity, I don't mean he owes her his heart. I mean he owes her kindnesss for putting her in that position. He knew she was straight. He's a handsome young man. He was spending time and intimate-space/talk with her. The possibility that a straight woman would fall for a guy she was spending a lot of time and emotional energy on is not off the charts. In fact, it's kind of likely.
He may be gay or bi--we haven't established for sure if he only goes for guys--but she
can be expected to develop feelings for the boy she's spending intense time with, who touches her, to cries on her, who's good looking, who's smart, etc.
There is no contradiction in a friend saying, "I've got a date with my boyfriend ot see the fireworks, so when he shows up, I"m gonna go be with Yoo." That, at least, is logical. Or just slip away after the selfie and say, "I"m gonna go find Yoo."
If he's gonna be mean about it with the "STOP BEING BETWEEN US," it's nicer to just say, "I have a date so I'm gonna go wait over there for Yoo." Big difference in quality of pain.
Wait? How can you not see Hee Bum is the one who went after this person who is a total stranger and USED her to keep connected with Yoo? He put her in the middle. From the start.
No, a friend doesn't "lose their role," because another friend gets a boyfriend. Friends are not disposable.
And yes, she has feelings, and that does rule some of her emotional responses and actions, but the fact remains: she was in the middle because of Hee Bum's demands and needs. She is in the middle because of her needs now, and both boys put here there (Hee Bum moreso).
If they just dump her now, it's like saying, "Well, we used you for our purposes, now get lost, girly."
"It is, to a degree. IT's very common to develop feelings for people with whom you share intimacies, pain, and time. THat's not to say he could definitely see it coming, but it was a possibility."----I completely disagree, by this logic i should just never share my time with others for fear of them developing feelings for me... The feelings she develops are on her, it just be NICE if he was considerate of them, which in my opinion he is. You're only talking about THIS scene, but i've been saying that this was the CLIMAX of the problem, he's been trying to give them space for CHAPTERS, since he and Yoo Won got back together, Jumi is the one constantly pushing to stay near him.
"And he did NOT just let out his sorrows. He manipulated, dragged, commandeered, and demanded. And when he showed his vulnerable side, laid his head on her, etc...please, that's the kind of way shoujo couples fall in love. No different."----Okay, but when he laid his head on her lap they were just friends... it isn't an inherently romantic thing to do. Have you never lain your head on the lap of someone close to you? While Hee Bum WAS pushy in his interactions with Jumi in the beginning, it was only during the beginning. He eventually calmed down and even gave up on Yoo Won once he and Jumi became friends. Jumi could've easily said no anyways, so who cares if he was pushy? If she didn't like it and hadn't felt pity for him she could've said no. JUMI chose to get involved, Hee Bum didn't force her...
"Read it again. Yes, he said Yoo Won was coming, but Yoo won wasn't there. He didn't even immediately go to Hee. He sat and drank booze with the two guys before going off to find his guy. And Hee Bum wasn't watching the door. He could have. He could have been facing the door waiting for Yoo Won To appear and then excused himself with, 'My date's here. Later.' "----Okay, so Hee Bum DID say Yoo Won is coming? In other words, he had prior plans to meet with Yoo Won? They're dating as evidenced by the kiss scene shortly after Yoo Won decides to start talking to Hee Bum, so i think the obvious assumption here would be that Hee Bum and Yoo Won were meeting up at the FIREWORKS SHOW on a date (you mentioned how sharing intimacy is how people fall in love in shoujo earlier and conveniently dismissed the fact that these two guys are dating right now and going to a fireworks show, which is a popular date scene in shoujo...). You're trying to convince me that they were just meeting up as friends to the fireworks show, but they're dating and going to a fireworks show... That paired with the fact that Hee Bum KNEW Yoo Won was coming implies heavily that it was supposed to be a date. If that isn't enough for you, they later held hands while watching the fireworks and only let go when Jumi started talking to them, which i believe is obviously because they didn't want to hurt her.
When did Hee Bum place any blame on Jumi? All he said was "you should stop putting yourself in between Yoo Won and I, it's going to end up hurting you" and then made it known that he knows about Jumi's feelings because she was trying to act like Hee Bum was acting jealous unnecessarily, which wasn't the case. He had been trying for a while to put distance between himself and Jumi and it FINALLY led to him addressing the issue directly.
Don't misconstrue my words... we were talking about her role as Hee Bum's go-between to Yoo Won, not her role as his friend... He still wants to be friends with her, this is what he is saying when she explodes at him in his room, he says he'll always be there for her, he is trying to remove her as the in-between because he knows how she feels about him and doesn't want to see her hurt when he shows skinship and whatnot with Yoo Won. He wants her as JUST a friend, he doesn't want her tagging along on their dates and intimate times because it'll hurt her.
I acknowledge that he talked to her first and was trying to use her to talk to Yoo Won, what i DON'T acknowledge is you acting like Jumi had no say in the matter... She has feelings and thoughts and could've chosen not to be the go-between at any time, she chose not to because she sympathized with Hee Bum.
Their friendship was only one reason i gave you for him going over to her, you conveniently left out the other reason, that being that he knows about her feelings. He loves Jumi as a friend and knows she loves him so he doesn't want to ignore her to be with his boyfriend... he is in a very complicated situation and i don't think you're giving him enough consideration.
Okay, so because he's handsome, he can't interact with straight women for fear of them falling in love with him? Girls don't just instantly fall for any guy they spend time with by the way, they can have guy friends too, that is why the "friend zone" is such a popular topic among guys... I already explained that he HAS been trying to acknowledge her feelings, he has been trying to create some distance between them to give her time to get over her feelings, that is why she later comes into his room and explodes at him saying "what, now that you and Yoo Won are together i'm not need anymore" to which he responds, "no, i'm always here for you" which indicates that she is still a very important friend to him. If he wasn't avoiding her because he was done using her, then the only other reason would be because he noticed how she felt about him. It wasn't JUST NOW revealed that he knew how she felt, he's been having moments where he'd go straight faced and look at her for a second that should've given you insight on the fact that he knew.
There are interactions and then there are interactions. His and hers were especially intense and intimate. He was needy and she was attentive. It's easy to develop feelings in those situation, and he should have foreseen the possibility of that, as should she have. Doesn't mean either one HAS to go out with the other. I had a friend, very close, who developed love feelings for me, but I didn't for him. And I was honest. I didn't play games, but I didn't avoid him, either. I didn't decide his use was over and I had no time for him.
The phrasing of Hee Bum's rejection--that Jumi needed to stop being between them--is where I take issue. It's cruel. Period. And though I don't think he intended to be cruel, he placed the blame on HER. She can't help what she feels anymore than he can help what he feels for Yoo Won. But he demanded and dragged Jumni between him and Yoo Won for HIS purposes. They eventually became friends--yay, nice--but just as she was there for him, he needs to be more there for her in a kind way. Thta's what friends do. She may not even be aware that she's imposing on his time with Yoo Won. And it's fine to say, "I need time alone with my guy, k?"
But to blame the other person for being exactly where you put them is shitty.
"There are interactions and then there are interactions. His and hers were especially intense and intimate. He was needy and she was attentive. It's easy to develop feelings in those situation, and he should have foreseen the possibility of that, as should she have. Doesn't mean either one HAS to go out with the other."----I think you should go back and read again, their interactions weren't intimate. They were JUST friends for most of the manga so far, all of those "interactions" you referencing to were BEFORE Jumi had developed romantic feelings for Hee Bum. She first started to like him when he showed up to save her from that red head and her gang, which was AFTER literally EVERY scene that you've labelled as romantic, those were all platonic scenes between friends, you're just looking into them. Both Hee Bum AND Jumi only looked at each other as friends during those times and there wasn't any romantic inclination until after she first started to look at him that way. In other words, at one point their feelings were both in one place, friendship, until Jumi's progressed farther. This is on her, not Hee Bum... As far as they were BOTH concerned he was just interacting with his friend, then she fell for him because of he showed up to save her. People don't go into interacting with other people assuming that the other might develop romantic feelings for you... I don't see where you are getting with this, it's just not true. He didn't need to take into account that she might fall in love with him... It wasn't on either of their minds in the first place, they started out as just friends.
"The phrasing of Hee Bum's rejection--that Jumi needed to stop being between them--is where I take issue. It's cruel. Period. And though I don't think he intended to be cruel, he placed the blame on HER."----I don't think he WAS cruel to her, just blunt. Okay, once again, WHEN did he place the blame on her? He was BLUNT, not mean. He said "stop getting in between Yoo Won and I, you're going to get hurt." and later showed that he knows how she feels about him. He was looking out for her. He's saying that "since you like me, if you stay with Yoo Won and I during our more intimate instances you're going to be hurt.", it's common sense, no one wants to see the one they like with another person. He's saying "you're third wheeling in our date and if you keep doing things like this you're going to end up hurt".
"They eventually became friends--yay, nice--but just as she was there for him, he needs to be more there for her in a kind way."----I've mentioned this a few times already, but he IS being there for her... You're making this out to be a situation that it clearly isn't. He genuinely cares for Jumi now, he initially didn't, but he does now. In the chapter where Jumi goes over to his room he says "i'll always be there for you" which he wouldn't have said if he was "throwing her away", he still wants her as a friend, he DOESN'T (as of right now) want her romantically. Him distancing himself ISN'T him throwing her away now that he is with Yoo Won, it is him trying to give her some space so she can get over him and then they can both go back to being JUST good friends.
" She may not even be aware that she's imposing on his time with Yoo Won. And it's fine to say, 'I need time alone with my guy, k?' "----I've already went over this as well, Hee Bum REALLY cares about her AND he knows how she feels about him. He doesn't want to shoo her away by saying something like how he's on a date. It should be, and is, obvious that the two people who Jumi already knows are dating are going on a date when they decided to go to the fireworks show together. Meaning, by common sense, by just SHEER logic, she should've known to leave Hee Bum when Yoo Won showed up. Jumi KNEW Hee Bum was waiting on Yoo Won, he even said Yoo Won would be coming and she STILL chose to keep herself IN THEIR DATE despite having feelings for Hee Bum, Hee Bum is just saying "if you keep doing this, you're going to get hurt. I know how you feel about me".
Sorry, but most regular not thick-skinned folks are gonna find it mean if a friend said, "Hey, you need to stop getting between me and X." That is accusatory. THat is not kind. That is not a favor. That IS blunt, but blunt in an "it's your fault" way.
If you don't think it's cruel, fine. But if you look at most of the comments here, there is a preponderance of folks who did see it as harsh.
And he set up the situation by being beside her. HE was expecting Yoo Won. He didn't stay by the door or on the stairwell, he went up to the roof and next to Jumi and STAYED there.
If I'm waiting for my husband, trust me, I'm gonna be looking toward the door, waiting to catch sight of him and then excuse myself and meet him.
If Hee Bum is so damned concerned about not having Jumi between him and Yoo Won, then HE needs to stop putting her there.
I realize that the way Hee Bum said it was really harsh, but i don't think he said what he did with the intention of hurting her. It seemed obvious to me that he noticed her feelings, probably both him AND Yoo Won noticed actually, and he didn't want to see her suffer anymore so he told her to stop tagging along when he and Yoo Won go out because it is inevitable that they're going to act lovey dovey at some point in front of her. If you noticed, neither of them has even TOUCHED each other while she is present until this chapter and even here they hid the touch. I think that Hee Bum is actually trying to be considerate, if he'd continued to treat her the same way, what with all the late night meetings and alone time together, she might NEVER get over him and might just continue to fall for him, like she did up to now because of their interactions. I don't think he is telling her that they can't hang out anymore, just that there needs to be some distance between him and her to let her get over him, i also think that he is telling her that if he and Yoo Won are going to something like a fireworks show that she shouldn't play the third wheel because it makes things awkward for him and Yoo Won considering that they know how she feels and it is just going to hurt her once they decide that they aren't willing to give up skinship for her anymore.