Returns for 8 chapters* sorry
Ohhh thanks
Just reread chapter 34 until chapter 39 and Suhan officially stated that he had past experiences but only physical relationship due to his secondary gender when it have come difficult to bear his heat cycle with only suppressant. Suhan didn't have an affair when he was married but before that he had past experiences.
In chapter 39 it's written :
“Suhan had some experiences before, but for him, these encounters had always felt like an unavoidable burden, tied to his unique biological traits. Since becoming an adult, he’d relied heavily on suppressants to control his urges, but there had been times when circumstances didn’t allow it.
Just like everyone else, he’d occasionally allowed himself to engage in these acts—perhaps to prove to himself that he wasn’t the only one overly sensitive or unique. But each encounter only brought deep regret and discomfort. Some people claimed it was a waste to let a few unpleasant experiences color all future relationships, but Suhan had no interest in exploring physical pleasure with numerous partners.
Most alphas Suhan had encountered were brute types, trying to dominate him with strength and pheromones. Many were arrogant idiots who acted like they were Casanovas, oblivious to the fact that he found the experience nauseating and degrading. This time, he thought it would be the same; the only difference was that he was with someone familiar.”
I think a lot of the readers and spoilers are missing a key point of the story. Before you pass judgment on how much you hate the MC or think he's a jerk for no reason you have to understand his character.
Well...imo from reading the novel, the story really is about Soohan learning how to love and let himself be loved. He didn't grow up experiencing love or accepting that his parents loved him. So with that in the way, it's easy for him to dismiss anyone's affection for just them wanting to serve themselves.
For example: ML's parents just helped him and his dad to save face, they gave him scholarship to promote their company, his own father just tries to be good to make himself feel better about being a thug, etc.
In many ways, Soohan is selfish and bitter who was hardened by a rough childhood under his absent father and abusive grandma. He had it so good under Yeonsoo's family but he's already put up a wall around his heart so he fails to recognize the good things. He had a father who is trying to make amends, a young puppy ML that loves him unconditionally, future in-laws that recognize his potential but his bitterness is stopping him from acknowledging all that. That's why I think the story is about Soohan learning to love and be loved.
He has a victim mindset that just grates my gears sometimes too. But that's just how he is. He's scared, he's insecure about his life, he has no real life purpose but to be successful and give the world a middle finger.
But I don't think I'd be any better if I were the MC.
Also, he has a real legit reason why he's cold to the ML before his amnesia.