Reading the novel…..u realize that they stopped pretending to be in love cause it became real, but for different reasons, wont accept it. Its infuriating. Like listen: “ He had wanted the prince to hold onto him. Luce had clung to the faint hope that perhaps he harbored even a shred of feeling for him, that Ail might hold onto him sincerely. ”
“All he wanted was for Ail to say, Stay by my side. I need you. If he’d heard just those words, Luce would have willingly stayed. ”
“No, even if it was a lie, it would have been enough. If he had just told him not to leave, if he had said a single word asking him to stay… If he had simply asked to keep him close, he might have abandoned everything and chosen to remain by his side. ”
But ofcourse neither shows an ounce of this desperation, instead they throw insults and harsh words. Luce says he wants to leave, Ail doesnt know how else to keep him. He lacks the ability to show that. Also in survival mode, emotionally stunned literally. He cant show vulnerability. Everyone ignores he was just a kid thrown in power fights. And the same with Luce. He lives for others, makes himself as small for them. Afraid to end up like his mother. But he still loves Ail. And he just wants one word from him, never saying a word himself about his feelings(understandable) but like they go in circles.
Reading the novel…..u realize that they stopped pretending to be in love cause it became real, but for different reasons, wont accept it. Its infuriating.
Like listen:
“ He had wanted the prince to hold onto him. Luce had clung to the faint hope that perhaps he harbored even a shred of feeling for him, that Ail might hold onto him sincerely. ”
“All he wanted was for Ail to say, Stay by my side. I need you. If he’d heard just those words, Luce would have willingly stayed. ”
“No, even if it was a lie, it would have been enough. If he had just told him not to leave, if he had said a single word asking him to stay… If he had simply asked to keep him close, he might have abandoned everything and chosen to remain by his side. ”
But ofcourse neither shows an ounce of this desperation, instead they throw insults and harsh words.
Luce says he wants to leave, Ail doesnt know how else to keep him.
He lacks the ability to show that. Also in survival mode, emotionally stunned literally. He cant show vulnerability. Everyone ignores he was just a kid thrown in power fights.
And the same with Luce. He lives for others, makes himself as small for them. Afraid to end up like his mother. But he still loves Ail. And he just wants one word from him, never saying a word himself about his feelings(understandable) but like they go in circles.