Hmm

Yeh he’s obsessed nlg but I’d rather that than abusive/a lot of noncon and toxic (aka “Jinx”)

Well, that's the problem, at least for me. (Can't speak for Violet.) The obsession, jealousy, and controlling, manipulative behaviour depicted in this story is absolutely a part of an abuser's playbook.
But the way it's written—especially through Jeongyun's blushy, pleasurable reactions—allows readers to do exactly what you did: separate it from stories like Jinx to make it seem as if Chacheon is more of a "green flag". He's not. He displays (literally) textbook abuser behaviour. He just doesn't use his fists to do it.

This doesn't make any reader bad for reading and enjoying it and stories like it. I read them too. But I do think it's important that we clearly recognise *what* we're reading in fiction so we can readily identify it in real life.

exactly!!

Oh huh I never thought of it that way. So the actions seme do are kinda watered down because it’s under the point of view of uke. That makes a lot of sense and does change my thoughts on seme