What to do?

queen, don’t let them choose your future for you !!!

Easy to say hard to do girl (￣ε(#￣)Σ

Im so sorry this is happening to you. Try to reason with your parents tell them you wanna focus on building your life and completing studies. Youll look for a partner when its time. Unless they are brown parents cus i would understand wanting to reason with them is kinda useless. But still do try .. and they legally cant get you married forcefully. Dont go into marriage if you are not sure

i knooowwwbut i’m glad you found a solution.. and i hope it’ll works out well for you

Yeah they are... Why you brown too?

Thanks

Same I don’t wanna get married like ever but my mom is like you have to get married one day ╥﹏╥
Lavender marriage sounds nice but where do you even find a guy like who your parents will also like? This sucks. Anyway all the best. I hope you can do it

That's what!!! What you gonna do? Marry?

It's 21st century, any people are like that in this time too? My grandma agree with my opinion - then a partner is better get a dog..... ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

can i ask where do you live and how old are you? ik you said above youre brown so maybe my advice is useless since it’s based off of my own reality of living in america and as someone who just finished college, but if you are able to attend college (and ik that it is super expensive and idk if you live in an area where either uni is gov. paid or is affordable, or if it’s easy to get financial aid or scholarships), but where i am now (america), a big point you can bring up is that currently, education is SUCH a vital (and unfair) point in finding a career, that it’s nearly impossible to get an above minimum wage salary of a job with the near potential of salary raises without even a BA degree, completion of a trade program or school, or previous field experience. even if your parents dont see the point of you having a longterm career, say this will up your “candidacy” for marriage and a better background for your family line, provide better opportunities and chances for a marriage to someone with a better job or higher career opportunities, and a better life for their future grandkids (regardless if you ever plan on really having them). the world is only getting pricier, and job market is only getting harder with competition, the ever changing society due to technological advancement, and social unrest. it’ll be easier to pursue higher education now, and to create a better background for you and your future family (emphasize this if your parents really care about background), and you can even argue that itll be better to attend school since youll be surrounded by other people your age who are clearly pursuing higher education as well, thus giving you a chance to really find suitors that you can spend time judging. and ofc youll have a couple years to bring them home so they can see for themselves. tell them it’s also better to marry a bit later, that now, it’s considered “indecent” and “low-life” to marry during the age someone is just out of college (which is stupid, bc who cares when 2 consenting adults are marrying past 22, but id still REALLY flourish this perspective since it really is common for ppl to consider marriage at an age older than the previous generation did, so if your parents seem like theyd take this type of argument into consideration, id REALLY push this narrative. i have a friend who got away from having marrying at 25 bc she persuaded her parents that it’s seen as “unclassy” to marry right after college, bc it’s a “trashy” or “gold-digging” look for young woman, and that at this age, no young man who’s new in the workforce would even consider marriage or be considered stable enough for marriage. even if youre a guy, you could use this argument bc misogyny and shitting on women’s circumstances are universal traits of every society LOL). and id recommend visiting college campuses even if you dont go, since being surrounded by other ppl from around ur generation will also give u conmections to find someone for a lavender marriage, and even give you opportunities to escape either through career options or just giving you chances to move away. also lots of colleges dont check who attends if they’re large seminars, so u should just go to random classes for free education teehee.

Thank you for the advice, I really appreciate it (๑•ㅂ•)و✧

No way. My mom isn’t exactly forcing me to get married rn since I have uni admission exams in near future So yeah Im trying to avoid this topic and see where it goes idk

sorry for the super long post from above. but also, if college isnt an option, or if you live in a culture that is very different from the one im referring to so that my suggestions aren’t applicable, you can also try saying that it’s very common for girls (or boys) to boost their identity and their familial reputation through field work. internships or apprenticeships can be an option. especially working in business even offering yourself to try and work in storage or managing accounting in a store. try finding small businesses or family run businesses and offer your services for internship or field work. if youre good with your hands and ure tenacious with research, maybe try finding field work in places such as an autoshop or tattoo/piercing studio if you feel as if itd be safe for you to do those (and if you have time- tbh this route is harder esp if youre a girl and you have brown parents). though the options ive offered have their own problems and also require some form of specialized interest that requires research and time and practice, but if youre into anything like that, and you pursue them, you might be able to find a possible income and skill set that lets you try and pursue income wherever you’re placed. working directly in a service shop also gives you an opportunity to make connections to either find someone you can marry for ur plans, or someone who can help you get away. regardless, ik my suggestions are rather specific and could be entirely unapplicable to your circumstances, and im sorry if theyre useless, but i do hope regardless of what happens, youre able to get out of things! good luck

haha! yeah, np! ik my replies are super long and maybe not super helpful to ur circumstances, but i hope whatever happens, you find happiness!

Hope everything goes your way...

I really appreciate you taking time and giving me suggestions. I am a college graduate, I am getting a job too, staying financially independent is not the problem, here we don't move out after some age, girls will go to husband's house after marriage tho, we stay with parents and honestly I don't plan on staying away from them, that is also partial reason for me not to marry, and my parents want me to marry for my happiness, they think I will become too lonely in future, tho I love solitary life , for them having a job,marriage and children is a stable life and I personally don't like that... They love me very much but they are too stuck in their own views and thinking they are doing it for my happiness, and people around them are not helping, so when ever I say I don't want marriage, they just ask me when you are 40 everyone have their own family then won't you be lonely? What if you regret it , then you won't find a partner. I am not telling I won't be lonely, but I LIKE being lonely. They are unable to understand it, I mean no one around me understands it even my friends, so I don't know what to do... I can't harshly cut ties with my parents too, so I have to persuade them somehow or if I am lucky I will find a partner who shares same sentiment...

Yea