I think rather than saying that people are quick to change lovers, it’s more accurate that people are desperate for love because we don’t receive enough of it in our lives. She is able to take a break and spend however long she wants waiting for love to come to her BECAUSE she has outside love to fall back on. She has her family, her work, her father in law, her neighbours. She has a support system. She’s got no pressure from her family to remarry and she’s able to continue on to have a career she loves. Those are really rare in this day and age. I can say with full confidence that I don’t have the vast majority of what she has in terms of support system and I’m not alone in that. Most people don’t. Especially for the era this was set in, she’s extremely fortunate that she’s in such a position and that her separated spouse is still allowing her to use her title and is helping her here and there. Not many people would do that.
Why they're desperate for love is beyond me. That's why you have to surround yourself with people that loves you. It's your life, you have to learn to choose yourself first, always.
However, I am referring to her situation in the story. The man that she loves never cheated but was emotionally absent and neglected her. For me, that type of problem in a marriage can still be fixed so long as you still have the heart to try and the other party is willing to change. She on the other hand, seems like she wants to as she truly loves the man still. Thus, explains my comment above. If the story even hinted no speck of regret from the man, then I would have been on the same boat as the others and urged her to leave him, but the story is telling otherwise.
A lot of people were commenting to leave the man, but marriage is deeper than a mere dating stage where if you find faults in who you're dating and you bolt. Again, I'm just referring to the story. And what makes it interesting for me.
Why they're desperate for love is beyond me. That's why you have to surround yourself with people that love you. It's your life, you have to learn to choose yourself first, always.
However, I am referring to her situation in the story. The man that she loves never cheated but was emotionally absent and neglected her. For me, that type of problem in a marriage can still be fixed so long as you still have the heart to try and the other party is willing to change. She on the other hand, seems like she wants to as she truly loves the man still. Thus, explains my comment above. If the story even hinted no speck of regret from the man, then I would have been on the same boat as the others and urged her to leave him, but the story is telling otherwise.
A lot of people were commenting to leave the man, but marriage is deeper than a mere dating stage where if you find faults in who you're dating and you bolt. Again, I'm just referring to the story. And what makes it interesting for me.
I think your view is very privileged. People who never knew love in childhood will seek it anywhere and everywhere but won’t know how to keep it because they never knew what it was to begin with. Love is an intangible thing and a fluctuating concept with no fixed form. There’s so many different types of love too and so many types of infatuation that seems like love and isn’t love. It’s privileged of you to assume everyone has any idea what love is even supposed to be from the beginning let alone know how to do it or have the finances to get therapy in order to learn. It’s not something taught in schools and even then, not everyone has the privilege of learning in school.
As for the story itself, like I said, she’s very very fortunate. For the era this is set, she would have been forcibly remarried. A neglectful husband is actually worse in this instance. A cheating husband would still keep up appearances and the wife would still have her life maintained and in the event of divorce, with evidence of infidelity, she can get spousal support. A neglectful husband wouldn’t have been maintaining her life in the way she needed and on top of that, the courts wouldn’t have granted her spousal support since this falls under irreparable differences. She tried and begged her husband for years to give her a crumb and he couldn’t even do that much for her. It’s not unreasonable to want a divorce. The fact that he hasn’t listened and then stalked and followed her is actually more concerning than anything else. It’s being romanticised here but it’s actually really obsessive and a massive red flag.
Marriage doesn’t mean that you should tolerate abuse. Neglect IS abuse. Infidelity is also abuse. Constant insults are also abuse. Lack of emotional support is also abuse. Preventing her from finding a job is also abuse. They’re working it out because that’s the way the author wrote it but she should actually be running for the hills because people like that never actually change and I know this from experience. Love alone is not enough to sustain a marriage nor a relationship. It’s your choice to believe what you want to believe in but please reevaluate your own privilege on the matter.
you do not know me and what i've been through, and it is my choice to not share. same thing with you and all the other readers, I do not know a spec of your real life story and I choose not to.
I do not incorporate my feelings and experiences with the stories I'm reading, i am here to enjoy a story written by others. Hence, why the story is interesting.
I understand where you're coming from, however, you are taking this too seriously. My choices in life, does not represent what I read, and I read a variety of genre.
Go find someone else to argue with if you're only looking to vent about how sorry your life is.
some people are quick to change lovers that they forgot that someone who's in-love just wants to be treated right by their partner.
i guess the FL's emotion's a lot more realistic than what others would've wanted.
I just like the story so far, keeps you engaged. hope there's more character development with the ML.