i feel like you're failing to appreciate all this from a perspective other than the one we get as readers.
imagine in you own life you get to know someone, you have realizations about your sexuality bc of them, you put in all your love and effort and then discover they have a document where they've been describing all of your behaviours.
it'd be striking and hurtful, and you'd probably feel blindsided about not knowing where the limit lies between inspiration and reality. again, WE know that dohu's intentions quickly changed but how in the world should juheon act?
it's also not true that dohu didn't know it was wrong or he thought it was better not to tell, he constantly went back on the document and even was preparing to tell juheon. dohu's mistake in the end was him being a coward. he was too scared that it'd be a deal breaker to juheon so he decided against being honest.
obviously i'm not saying he deserves to be depressed or that it's an easy situation to be in or that this is hus fault 100%. but what i will say is that you're being very dismissive of juheon's feelings and for some reason him in his hurt state and broken heart should've acted logically, or that he wasn't justified in feeling how he felt.
i'll reiterate, dohu isn't guilty of the worst sin imaginable or anything, but manipulating the person you've already hurt so badly into caring for you... that's a very selfish asshole move.
the same as you accuse me of dismissing Juheon's feelings, which is not true, I can say that you forget that Dohu's way of thinking is different than usual person.
Yes, he was scared of Juheon's reaction, and many times he wanted to tell him but he FAILED which I also pointed out.
They ended things without talking about everything properly, despite them both still being in love. Just leaving for years, without giving a chance a person you love is also "asshole move".
All I'm saying is the way this break up happened wasn't only Dohu's fault, it was on both sides.
So did u just totally ignore dohu's problems and stories? Accusing others of dismissing juheon's feelings but did u ever put dohu's special way of thinking and feeling emotions into consideration when u typed all this?
Nobody is expecting him to act logically when he was overwhelmed by everything. But dohu tried to like and understand juheon from the start because if u read the manhwa properly, dohu said multiple times he dosen't get stuff like that.
All they needed was time and communication. Putting the blame fully on dohu just shows that you're being ignorant of the most important trait about dohu.
It's like dohu's inability to think and feel like others is literally one of the main obstacle for their relationship. Shocking right.
Ur 100% right, so many people down in the comments are being straight up dismissive and cruel regarding juheon, saying it wasn’t a big deal, his paranoia is stupid, and his anger isn’t justified.
Just because you would be okay getting used like that doesn’t mean he has to. He had every right to leave that man. AND HE DID HEAR HIM OUT, he practically begged him, but dohu had the mindset of “ah well i was gonna leave anyway”.
He did give dohu time to answer for what he did.
I heavily disagree. Juheon heard dohu out completely, he went out of his way, went to dohus house to get an explanation and begged for it.
Juheon thought the explanation was trash, so he left. In what way was juheon wrong for this? Literally every average break up goes this way. If juheon wants to leave dohu, he’s 100% justified.
if you talk about the period when he told an autistic person to "let him go" and he did exactly that because he thought that would be what Juheon wants to stop being angry at him, yeah sure.
this post isn't to drag Juheon btw, it's to showcase Dohu's perspective, because many people blame everything JUST on him, when he never had bad intentions towards Juheon
well that's exactly what the point is, Dohu's thinking is different. at first he didn't even think how he approached Juheon is wrong, and it took him A LONG TIME to even realise that maybe he should tell him.
Juheon KNOWS Dohu is different. Juheon's feelings of pain are valid but Dohu couldn't process this break up like a normal person would.
Juheon leaving him was not wrong but it doesn't mean it didn't hurt Dohu, who needed more time and and more direct communication.
They both still loved each other back then, that's why Juheon leaving him like this is WEIRD, which makes me think he might have done it for a bigger reason btw(but still that hurt Dohu).
You makes it seem like Juheon could immediately throw Dohu away for what he did. They still loved each other that why it's not that simple lol! all they had to do is talk PROPERLY, but because he left they had no way of doing so
Thank you this is exactly what I mean (๑•ㅂ•)و✧
I think no one who defends Dohu wants to put Juheon down, just acknowledge that Dohu is a special case, he never wanted to hurt Juheon but some people act like he's the devil omg
They both love each other, they just need to talk this through...
That’s not what I’ve seen, I’m seeing nothing but love and support for dohu, and absolute hatred for juheon. People want a 2nd ml, a chasing arc, a regret arc, etc, they want the author to punish juheon for breaking up and leaving duho.
Just because duho is a special case doesn’t mean juheon needs to somehow baby him and accommodate. Juheon also didn’t leave him because he’s a “special case”, he heard the explanation, he heard duho say sorry, and he still wanted to break up, which is completely fine. Now I agree that the reason juheon had a breakdown is probably because of his family and on top of that the situation with duho, and they definitely still love eachother (at least I think juheon does)
Sorry, let me rephrase, when I say accommodate, I mean justifying his bad actions with autism. At the end of the day, you hurt someone, saying your autistic (which dohu does not do, only commenters) doesn’t stop the hurt you caused.
Dohu actually explained himself fairly well to juheon, and I think his apology was sweet. Sadly juheon was too hurt, and his past trauma caught up, and he left.
i'm sorry but having an extreme reaction to being used by someone (which is all juheon knows about) is not an asshole move. for example, my ex tried to contact me and came to my house months after we broke up. i was very in love with them so by your logic i should've given them a chance? and again i said all dohu's responsible for doing is being a coward. that's it. no grand sin or fault. it's all a big misunderstanding that stems from such a small mistake, i wouldn't say dohu is to blame for how everything turned out. he is, however, more responsible than what people paint him as.
i don't think you read my comment in good faith so i'll reiterate my point: dohu was a coward. that's it. he knew juheon might've responded badly to knowing he was initially being used so he kept quiet. i understand why he did and i'm not even saying it's unreasonable to act that way but that it's unreasonable to expect things from the other person in this situation. i get dohu's inner turmoil but you again fail to see that we know what they both think but they only know what the other tells. i get that had juheon tried harder to communicate, dohu would've gotten a chance to fully explain himself but... how can you expect a heartbroken person to be sympathetic toward the person that broke their heart in the first place?
dohu isn't a bad person bc he's antisocial or bc he thinks differently, but the fact that he is and does constantly gets used to justify his bad actions. pretending to be burned to force the person whose heart you broke to care for you? 100% wrong. seeing that person still care for you and being dismissive and cruel? 100% wrong. hiding your immoral reasons for getting close to someone? 100% wrong.
idrk why some ppl think that being autistic means "baby" or that he has 0 understanding of anything. "oh the poor wittle baby hid crucial information and got hurt by his own mistake? bad juheon! you should've heard him out and interpreted his explanation in the most favorable way possible!! how dare you have feelings despite your significant other being neurodivergent? you should know to never take them at their word!"
idk about them but people are allowed to break up with an autistic person and also, what dohu did wrong had NOTHING to do with his autism. hiding things bc you're scared of the consequences? average human experience. manipulating someone into caring for you? neurotypicals do it all the time too!
for them it's a matter of obligation, like that juheon HAS to give dohu a chance or sm. could he? sure. would that have been better? probably. would it have changed anything? who knows really
and again, dohu's mistakes aren't even that big of a deal but they do have... repercussions and yes he'll have to suffer those
I've seen a lot of people blaming solely Dohu for what happened between them, and I think it's not so black and white.
HUGE yapping ahead!!!!
Dohu is extremely antisocial, he always had trouble keeping realtionships with people. He never would have thought someone like Juheon would seriously wanna date him. He thought Juheon will get tired of him soon anyways.
His intentions were never to hurt Juheon.
Yes, he approached him on purpose but along the way he realized that juheon started to mean more to him.
He is obviously on the spectrum, he doesn't understand things like other people do. I don't think he's a saint, but when he failed to tell the truth to Juheon for so long, he thought it would bring more harm then good. He thought it's not that important, because he loves him RIGHT NOW.
Juheon got hurt by Dohu hiding his intentions. Dohu explained his reasoning and still, Juheon decides to ghost him, cutting off any possibility of reconciliation(even if that was for their own good because of his family blackmailing him, that was still a shitty move that left Dohu in depression for 4 years). Juheon also knows Dohu is WEIRD and thinks differently, he knows he has trouble understanding emotions, so why couldn't he give him a some time to think this through and explain himself properly?
Yes, Dohu made a mistake by not being honest with him, but because of the way he thinks, he thought not telling him would be for the better. He realized he loves Juheon, so why he approached him wasn't important to him.
Yes, Juheon got hurt by Dohu, but he got so blinded by his pain he didn't give Dohu a chance to truly explain his feelings and why he did all that. He also overlooked that with Dohu, it was different than with others. Sure, Dohu "used" him, but if Juheon were to calm down for a second, he would see he was also genuine with him.
Dohu initially got close the Juheon for a reason different than Juheon thought it was. But the outcome ended up the same. Dohu failed to recognize how hurt Juheon will feel when he finds out the truth. That's what pains Juheon the most, but also that's just how Dohu is. Dohu needed more time to process this situation, to properly apologize to him, but when he finally realized this, it was too late.
Not to mention, man, all the trauma aside, Dohu really haven't done anything THAT evil! he used him as a muse, but if you read that story with eyes open, you can see that besides that, he just got captivated by him as a person, from the beginning. how he analyzes him, he even said it himself, writing helps him understand people, it's just his way of getting to know the person he's interested in.
so yeah, I think they are both at fault to how things ended those 4 years ago.
and YEAH, they just need to TALK lol.