um might be wrong but i’m pretty sure it’s the first thing you mentioned. or at least part of it? he’s scared of her reactions to a part of himself no really knows and obviously trauma is something difficult to talk about it so to be open with that, especially with someone you love deeply is very hard if u ask me. but im sure theres also more to it this is all i could think of rn
Its sad but Oh so relatable.. I get the difficulty of opening up to those you love deeply. Its harder because the stakes are higher. Its shows how much he loves her but in a fucked up way. He can talk to the sister because he doesnt care, he doesnt care what she thinks, does, etc. She can be in the same space as him, he doesnt care, because she doesnt really matter that much to him. Contrary to SuAe who means the world and he prefers to stay away from because he cant function near her, because she desarms him even 10 years later. Because he cant bring himself to not feel nothing even if in his messy mind it would be better to feel nothing. Someone please, helps this boy stuck in an adult body.
Anyway I am a yearner for this type of shit personnaly, bring the mess and chaos, bring the dramas I am in.
The only thing I dont get here is why he finds her difficult and scary? Is he because he loves her and is scared about her reactions, how she might changes opinions about him, finds him pitiful? is he because he finds her reactions to be too unpredictable? For sure I dont remember SuAe to be a difficult lover so I dont get it. She is understanding and forgiving and full of love to give. Why would she be difficult? Is there a misunderstanding? Is it his trauma talking? Dude has a long way to go to be able to have a healthy relationship. But still I have hope he is gonna heal.