All those build ups with Shinya js for Suzuki to give himself to another man.

I can understand complex character, but that part is smth I cannot fathom — no matter how much i try to wrap my head abt it

I agree. It’s not even the sex itself, it’s the timing, if he had sex with Norman from early beginning, that’s completely different versus now after blossoming love and all that tension. It’s also his attitude about it, he is so casual about sleeping with a male after all that. He thanked Sugiki for it but I still feel uneasy, and I hope in ch 38 where he said Sugiki changed his identity (orientation), the ‘another guy’ he referred to better be Sugiki.