.
.
.
.
.
.
.in most situations uke take seme as example like whenever situation gets worst he thought what seme would do , by understanding the capable guy like seme uke thought I won't become like him at all and he told seme straight he also won't kill him as he wanted when that kang inwo guy got killed for being traitor he told seme when he gets someone to protect nobody else matter now seme care about uke he will die for him if it meant to sabe him that time seme laugh on kang inwo that uke is not not my child just like u protect your daughter later seme understood what he meant and he was doing exactly but uke doesn't want that , can say they are broked people and mentally ill due to environment they grew in prince has genetic mental illness can't be cure while seme can be cured cuz it's trauma that made him this way. Either way after reading i felt yah good they become happy but it's also good author emphasis on therapy instead of "love can cure everything shit" usually authors use but they could have tone down lots of brutal beating and rape between seme and uke it was hard to read hold they cut that whole part down in manhwa
Some lines in this novel left me speechless --
"I need to learn to paint. To capture you mastu-rbating."
It'd be a masterpiece. I'll get it hung in the national gallery. Shin Haebeom's laugh mixed with a sigh.
"Imagine it. Guys drooling over you."
"Guys would bring their fortunes to see you in person. I'd make them all kneel and beg. Oh, I can hear it. Bastards pleading to suck the s tunning Jung Ryujin."
"You hear it too, right? Hmm? Imagine it?"
"Then be moderately pretty!"
______________________________
Jung Ryujin's sobbing pushed away the unpl easant memory. Shin Haebeom listened to his voice.
"You want to be my first that badly?"
"I don't need firsts."
He smiled slyly.
"I prefer lasts."
____________________________
Shin said:
"You said it yourself. A bad guy doing one good thing is touching, but a good guy doing one bad thing is disappointing."
_____________________
He chewed as thoroughly and for as long as possible. With the intent to eradicate the ling-ering regrets and hesitations deep in his heart, he moved his jaw.
I'll swallow Jung Ryujin's past. Just as he made me reborn.
Story has --- gang rape + violence + action + animal cutely
Characters review -
•➝[Jeong Ryujin(•uke)"age 21" ]+ (later due to trauma uke become sleep walker) = he become white lion member after his sister ryu yeonbi most beautiful actress publically executed for being in adultery with a married politician, after that he left with nothing but debt in his life to pay high amount he approached by leader of lion clan older man who pay his debt but he sleep with uke also his son forced uke for sex (son killed by seme ways) his life was trash there not much change after meeting shin (seme) it just become hell instead, he is soft hearted by nature and seme brutally rape him in novel till 65 chapters it didn't change much uke never want to kill seme as he wanted uke to hate him and loath him so he could kill him uke wanted to keep him alive till old age to regret his decisions he made uke do lots of bad things seme told him he become close with Prince also seme told uke to sleep with Prince made video so they can make scandal out of it but uke didn't made right angel with camera and seme got angry he also drugged Princeand become supplier later uke denied to ruin prince that way and consult him to doctor.
•➝ [Shin haebeom(•seme)"age 33")]+ (he become mad dog for uke)+ his right eye become impaired and his left arm become weak = he is sociopath by nature and commander of "Disciplinary Training Corps" & brutal believe in crude ways and never feel guilty over trampling others and his decisions himself, also sleep with Prince mother and he is her secret lover she helped him lot to reach commander position(seme break up with her by the end of 93 chapter of novel), he use uke as pawn to make uke aid of prince he offered him to uncle of prince who has genetic ED so he can't rape uke but he made seme and other members to do and made video (it was gang rape after this uke didn't wanted to meet seme and become mute not energetic but that didn't matter ri seme) , seme made uke stay with his older sister in hwollu resident she own seme rape uke continuously he stopped beating up uke when prince saw uke naked in Sauna bath and prince told not to be harsh on uke, after the son of white lion leade died in the name of uke it made seme angry that he "die for nothing but love" he laugh at him seme had grudge against white lion leaders cuz they took his father's money and flee to china leaving seme and his friend chiwon behind due to harsh world of military they trained like wild animals not humans it reflects in seme behaviour he has habit of making old man jokes and be perverted with uke highly obsessed with uke nipples later his life soley depends on keeping uke alive and safe he at night watch uke doing sleep walking and put him back to sleep even though doctor told uke to seek therapist but seme refused told "I m enough for him I will exhaust him by doing sex" he become crazy over uke later he regrets his choices he made for the first time in life and told uke to never forgive him, seme wanted to take companion with in hell which was uke but uke is too kind hearted he knows that "I will be alone in hell so I will devote myself to him even if it cost my life" also seme plan change cuz he fell in love with uke
•➝[Kwon Sehyuk(prince)"age 20"]= he is drug addict depending on drugs + he become limp in one leg = he got closer to ryujin(uke) for being similar in age also being his supplier of drugs he look up to shin(seme) later become his rival in love hsart despising seme he is very much puppy type and obey uke kinda childish due to his mother being controlling of him he cares and love his little brother who is only 7 years of age he has genetic ED that pass in nobel family due to that he is not capable enough as Sehyuk, he loves uke a lot first love young and that was the price he paid in process he is impulsive and kinda childish due to withdrawal symptoms of drugs he was on for long uke slept with him after seme told uke but he found comfort in him too. Later he almost Shot uke with gun cuz he was on drug but seme friend chiwon got shot instead and prince raped uke in office of seme in jealousy and hatred that he is with his mother and uke both.
.
.
************ Upcoming events Events****
*
•••1-"(uke hometown and killing of his rapists)"-- seme used prince orders and name to kill the uke's hometown's influencial family that was close with Prince uncle seme told that son of that family sexually assaulted uke and prince become saviour for uke seme use this situation as with one arrow killing 2 things breaking uncle trust on prince second uke's rapists, seme wanted uke and prince to get close but at some point he feel weird inside his heart by seeing them happily but not sure why , seme went to bar where that rapists was and uke's first virginity taker seme first killing happened when uke shouted to kill that guy and seme did before that he took the photo from that guy where "uke was naked and his body was full of cum cash in his mouth" that picture pleases seme he keep it in his wallet and called it "pretty" , as much biggest scene happened when seme killed whole family of that rapist guy by blowing them inside church uke witness that after seme gave bomb controller to uke and told him kill them all by his own hand uke was injured seme was injured uke was sure seme "felt sorry for him that's why he did that" prince was injured too he feel seme is more capable than him at this event prince get tu know that seme loves uke but seme said uke doesn't love seme and its one sided love (it was not lie uke hates seme atp) they had truck sex while prince was in sedatives saw uke getting banged by seme felt like dream to him , after that bomb incident seme also fell sick and this point seme become less abusive and while sick he keep clinging to uke told uke to feed him medicine by mouth and uke had to do it uke listens to seme cuz he scared of seme atp and doesn't like making him angry cuz seme is ticking bomb. This incident end uke avenge his rapists uke doesn't know if he should be grateful or just be happy those who made his life hell are in actual hell.
.
.
•2- (Prince grandfather island and seme become mad dog)-- uke asked by Prince to come with him to meet his grandfather he wanted to make uke his official spouse after they slept together uke was shock but always aware that seme must have some way out as he ask permission from seme to go with Prince grandfather'a privste island seme allowed uke expected seme to decline but he wanted prince and uke to get closer and it's best way to proceed with lam before that seme rape uke as usual but at some point uke was consentual with seme he knows he does it to torment him , this point was long time apart between seme and uke seme left uke to woohe who is also major she is half sister of prince and daughter of prince father but from concubine ,she is just like seme in behaviour uke can't understand her, grandfather of prince didn't approve uke for being low in rank also a Man , he told prince if he win in hunting contest he will approve but before that grandfather tried to rape uke but uke escaped and prince get to know what his grandfather did to uke still they did hunting cuz he thought this is the only way they both got kidnapped by a guy named kang inwo he was spy send by white lion who wanted him to bring uke back to clan in exchange of his daughter around uke age she was rebellion who got caught by seme and white lion promise to save his daughter kang inwo was only 35 years old he saw his daughter in uke strong and not coward he knew the relationship between seme and uke and uke wanted kang inwo to left prince out of it since they wanted uke not him , meanwhile seme searching desperately for uke when he gets to know they both are lost he regretted his decisions he made that he can handle kang inwo and let uke go with Prince he thought he should have stopped uke but there is no point on crying over spilled milk , uke was sure that seme will come to save him and yes he did he didn't sleep for days after uke left with Prince and after hearing news that uke got kidnapped he was mad and crazy that yatch fight is epic between kang inwo and seme uke saved dogs he brought with him from Prince grandfather he abuses and drug dogs there , seme arm severely got injured and his right eye lost its clear vison maybe he eyes might never recover ,but he was psycho to didn't care about his body when uke was front if him, they taken to hospital there new guy tayeoun who helped seme and he also helped them later to shift in Germany , after this incident seme become gentler and uke open up to seme he stopped hitting uke and let uke hit him instead also he peel fruits to feed uke.
••3-( Climax and revenge shifting to Germany together)---- now that woohe major become the next leader prince step down from becoming leader after he asked for forgiveness from uke and uke forgave him knowing that it was drug symptoms seme no longer wants to use uke instead want him to pursue study and have good life atp seme stopped caring about his own life uke knows and that's why after that tayeon guy suggested therapy for uke who was gangraped and traumatic he wanted uke to go to germany where clinic of his sister is but uke told that seme also needs therapy they both need one he will go if seme go and seme said yes , so to leave country he break up with mother of prince finally and fake his death by putting dead body of already dead guy in his office and he will come to airport with uke he will left with new identity uke told seme to open backery in Germany and he said yes I will sir he start using respected phrases with uke instead of calling him chicken or idiot cuz uke doesn't like that at the end moment prince first love just ended uke wait for seme holding his wallet left by seme but uke only saw family photo of seme not his gang rape photo seme put in wallet seme didn't come on time cuz he went to prince uncle house to kill him he hated how he touched uke how he brought young boys for him so eme was sure he will meet them all in hell cuz he is bad guy himself till than he has to survive to live with uke till his hair become grey and he gets old and just as seme reached airport uke jumped on him and fall asleep in hi arms seme thought uke will punch him cuz he had his photo but uke didn't see that he eat that photo by saying "it was my second treasure but first treasure is on my lap so I will eat it" they were in private plane finally he fall asleep in each other's arms. Seme keep saying I love to uke throughout these all events but uke called it bullshit uke wanted to hear apology from seme for what he did to him only then uke would tell send he loves him yess seme cried while in shower uke thought senth happend an he said "I m sorry ryuin for what i have done I will spend my whole life repenting them" only then uke said i love you to seme only in his sleep. Also uke sister die as traitor but seme made her hero and that was uke's last revenge he fulfill it blueprint she had they retrieved them. They start a new life now in foreign land recovering from their trauma
****Review**- I think it was decent read but I feel bad for uke I don't know how he fell for seme i think it was stockholm syndrome at his own level i feel toxin is much better I can understand why he end with garon but this I don't know how ryujin loved shin maybe he saved him multiple times prince is young and powerless but puppet of his mother and uncle , at the end seme become softer after 65 chapters of novel before that he was so cruel and he thought rape is sex also seme sleeping with mother of prince didn't left good taste in my mouth but i overlooked cuz that was necessary, country didn't got free from dictatorship they got decent dictator women got power at the end and seme and uke had nothing against corrupt system but people who were running it so after throwing them out they gotten satisfied also I feel seme had his own level of karma his eye injured arms become weak ... Well either way it was regret i think the are military men they are fucked up that's why seme is like this