I felt the same as the main character. Looking for someone to mess him up, getting hurt fr...

I felt the same as the main character. Looking for someone to mess him up, getting hurt from rough sex, thinking he deserved to be tainted. Then, he said he wanted to disappear. I felt it, because I did the same thing too. It hit me hard when I read that sentence. My heart was beating so loud and I just started shedding tears. The tears came by itself without warning, but I did not stop it either.

Searching for strangers to fuck you up, because I would rather endure that pain than the pain inside my heart. It was all just a cover up.

But all in all, I believe in healing. And I’m gonna heal, because I want to, just like haruhi did.