OH MAH GAW
Filial piety is a real thing, y'all. I live in the States with traditional Asian parents and filial piety is still goin' strong, even here. It is difficult. The automatic expectations are to get married, have kids, provide for the family, then take care of your aging parents. Yes, this sounds amazing and idealistic. But what if I don't want to get married? Or have kids? Well, because of filial piety, the choice doesn't even seem like an option. Of course you have an option but these expectations that are taught to us by elders don't break easily. It goes beyond the comments like "oh, I can't wait to see my grandkids" or "I'm just thinking about seeing you walk down the aisle". Sometimes, filial piety is made to feel natural and it becomes so engrained into us that we feel shame for not upholding the respect our elders and family should get. Wr may often think that it is our failure as children.
Lol, I didn't mean to write an essay but this chapter hit me hard. I'm straight and I am privileged as a straight cisgendered woman; thus, many times when I read BL or GL, I understand that I can never truly understand the plights of the LGBTQ community, despite being an ally. However as an Asian woman and a woman who does not necessarily want to get married or have kids (I'm cool if it happens but I'm not super interested in it), filial piety is a topic I struggle with a lot. Lol, thanks for reading and have a good day.
So true! it's the same in the arab world. My family is considered a little more open than other families and even they do have some expectation to how you live. marriage and work. people tend here to pressure to live in some type that goes well with the socity around them, they don't even notice how they pressure their own kids. especially girls. I think people to understand the people can lives in different styles and give freedom to how each one wants to live
Thank you for saying all this. I'm the same - the only difference is that I'm not Asian, I come from some rural corner of the western world, where you do hear people make these very same reasonings.
I’m mexican so this traditional ideology about marriage hits pretty hard. My mother is thankfully pretty americanized and accepting and “woke” but my I had this convo with my grandma the other day and she was also like “ur friends won’t do anything ur family will” like bruh
the convo about marriage hit different to ethnic kids with traditional parents huh