Thoughts about Haesoo

Treats him like an object? Mind to explain?

prolly bc he barely considers his feelings (up until now at least). Haesoo's like Joowon's favorite plushie. he wants to cuddle him and all, but he doesn't think about how H feels. he said a lot of hurtful things, never did anything to make haesoo feel safe or supported. the first time he ever said something nice to haesoo was when they had the phone call. same goes for haesoo though, they just treated each other lile crap

More like treats haesoo as someone who won’t be able leave him but not as an object. He let go of haesoo when haesoo asked for it tho and the focus is TxH now.

I agree that haesoo needs to be alone.

I think Haesoo means more to Joowon than favourite plushie lol XD although I love my plushies very much myself hahaha
That's the main problem with Joowon's character. He had and has good, pure intentions, he wanted to help him and protect him... But his methods were sometimes questionable or just bad.
Although I think he tried to show his feelings and affection by calling and telling Haesoo how much he misses him, by cuddling while sleeping, by small touches here and there, by visiting him and asking about his wellbeing or when he was worried about Haesoo living alone or by borrowing Haesoo his car etc.

Yup. I agree!

i’m pretty sure J at one point told haesoo that sometimes he wishes he(haesoo) were dead so he he wouldn’t be able to go anywhere....he also came inside of him even when haesoo specifically said not to because J was feeling possessive....

i just compared it with a child who can't let go of his fav plushie ._.
true, joowon did sometimes tease Haesoo with those little kinds of things, like asking him if he missed his hyung and stuff, but that honestly wasn't it. i know he's had good intention for the most part but that doesn't excuse the way he treated haesoo

It's him being unreasonable and posessive or jealous than thinking about him as an object?
Also as one user pointed although these things were veey wrong (no one would deny it) and harmful it looked as if he was begging to be noticed by Haesoo, as if he wanted to make Haesoo show him some honest feelings instead of fake indifference.
And yeah this scene were definitely the lowest of Choi Joowon in the whole story.

There’s more to it tho. There’s a comment where they say that Joowon is the person H wants but being able to date openly with taku is the kind of relationship H wants. J kept their relationship ambiguous because they can’t date normally. He let haesoo have freedom of dating others as long as he stayed by his side. He just can’t satisfy H all those years with the kind of set up they had and H is frustrated. JxH played safe because crossing the line means their family would be broken, so they kept their relationship casual. They couldn’t show openly how much they yearned for each other. They kept their interactions casual to prevent being invested which failed lol.

the person never said that j thought of h as an object. but he just *lowkey* treated him like one

I know that it was comparison but still I think it's a lot of deeper than that. I was just making fun of plushies.
I'm not gonna excuse some of his actions. But it's also important to understand someone's reasoning and context.
For me his these "small gestures" weren't just teasing, they were genuine and spoke volumes. But Haesoo most likely always thought it was mostly teasing and Joowon wasn't serious.

I still don't really agree with the wording the OP chose *shrug*

Kudos to you!

I disagree. I don’t think Haesoo wants to be with J and i don’t think he wants to be with Taku either. The second time H and T had sex, H thought about how meaningless his relationships were and how he wanted them to be meaningful. I genuinely don’t think he wants to go back to J at all. They don’t care about publicity or anything like that. Their family isn’t even a part of the decision making at the beginning. I think that J and H are each other’s first loves that they genuinely can’t get rid of. H wants to sever the connection because of the stress and the fact that J wants to keep him as property (e.g treating all his other relationships like casual things and telling H that he was the most important person in H’s life and that he couldn’t live without etc etc these are all examples of obsessive manipulation and it honestly feels like H doesn’t want to be codependent towards J and that J wants H to be in his life forever) and I will also add that it seems like H is using T as another one of those meaningless relationships. J and H were in love when they were kids, but not it feels like H sees it more as an obligation or maybe as something that he can’t really change. Like “that’s just how life is for us and that’s how it’s always going to be”.

Yep those little gestures was the only way he could show how much he cares while not announcing it.

Further more, J and H could’ve totally date openly. J knew that becoming an actor/model would complicate his future relationship with H (i’m pretty sure that i remember him deciding to become an Actor/Model to see H again but i don’t really recall). T is famous and yet him being gay wouldn’t affect his career. And to be honest, i don’t think J cares about his career at all. He tried to quit. He wants H more than he wants his job and his family. He’s just CHOOSING not to try and make things official. I feel like if he treated H more like T did, less like a fuck buddy that you used to have a connection with and more like an actual human being, maybe H and J could end up together. But i don’t think he will...

okay you don't have to

Yeah you don’t have to agree with my wording lmaooo

Oh yeah sure, i cant disagree with that but yall are talking this post way too serious i think xD

I can see what you mean, but I do think that their parents did have Influence on the toxicity in their relationship.