I still can't understand why eunho's existance made it dificult for jaeha.
There must have been something that i missed but i can't get what ...
i kind of forgot this story by now,,, but i'll try to give you an answer. first is with eunho's family. eunho's sister talked with jaeha right? i think that's when jaeha thought that if he hurt eunho again, it will also have an effect to eunho's sister as well as to their mother who took care of jaeha when his father (am i right?) was abusing him. jaeha knew for a fact that eunho loves him, and because of that, he is exposed to reasons that can hurt eunho. like when you love someone, you feel hurt with various things even if your partner doesn't intend to right? in short, he can unconsciously hurt eunho especially with all his worries and how his mind think (at that time). jaeha has been through a lot of failed relationship and he's afraid that it will also end like that with eunho. those are the reasons why eunho's existence made it difficult for jaeha, because as long as eunho is around and while jaeha was still not open to eunho with his worries (again, at that time) jaeha will keep his worries and anxiety growing and growing. he's afraid of getting eunho hurt but he's also afraid of getting himself hurt too so that's why he thought letting go of eunho was the right thing to do. i can't say it's exactly a foolish decision since i can't just disregard jaeha's feelings and it was not really easy for him to tell upfront people what he really feels, but i think he focused too much on himself that time that he kinda forgot eunho's feelings.
idk if you'll be satisfied with this answer since i really kind of forgot this one and the emotions i grasp while reading this before
thank you. I think I get it non :)
now*
I don't know why some of you hate jaeha when his side was clearly shown in the story. i honestly get jaeha and why did he do that. jaeha knows himself better than anyone else, and that's exactly the reason why he chose to let go of eunho. he knows that he can hurt eunho and his family anytime and that's the least thing he wants. after all the painful experiences and failed relationships he had, not just from lovers but also from family and friends, it's no surprising that jaeha feels fear of abandonment. he's afraid of getting himself hurt, but he's more afraid of hurting eunho. and honestly, as a person who doesn't open up to someone else, i can very much understand how hard it was for jaeha to tell eunho everything. especially since the last person he wants to share his past would be eunho, his love. running away has always been jaeha's defense mechanism. it's not that easy to change, you know. but he overcame that fear and told eunho upfront everything, and i want to commend him for that.
but of course, in eunho's side, it's not really easy to love someone for more than 10 yrs, and when he finally had the chance, it easily slipped on his hands. the fact that he had jaeha for a moment is definitely what's making it the hardest for him since he got to experience his love getting reciprocated. but after hearing jaeha's side, he can't help but blame himself. he blamed himself because he knew that his very existence is what making jaeha suffer. plus he never once realized that jaeha has been suffering alone all this time.
they have been both hurt. there would've been no conflict tbh if they did tell each other their worries right from the start they started dating, but i really can't blame them. it's not really that easy to open up especially if you've been hurt a lot and has been bottling up to yourself ever since. im just glad that they got the courage to confront each other again and still ended together and got their happy ending