Thoughts about new update and some spoilers

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All I can say is, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? LIKE WHATTT. So straight to the point of my thoughts, we see that SH intended to fuck NK so hard so he can get an answer from him, and that made NK cry and he was rejecting SH but SH asked like whyaee you rejecting? Arent you gonna say Yes, deeper my Lord or smth. So yeah after that we see NK and SH sitting while SH was like patting NKs head or hugging him of some sort then he said that whenever you're with me your always crying. Then we see nakyums thoughts, and he said that it was warm, and it reminded him of the TRASH so he flinched, maybe because it was weird for him to have the same feeling he got from the TRASH to SH.

Then we see NK answering the question he always avoided, then he just started admitting those things or feelings to SH. Remember in one previous chapter, NK told the servant that his heart always races and he becomes hot, because our bby nakyum doesn't really know what he's feeling, then after like confessing to SH, puts the D inside his ass then he kissed SH and licked his lips like asking him to kiss him back an he obliged. But then again, remember like chapter 40 smth? NK kissed him but SH did NOT MOVE AN INCH LIKE he was thinking what a drag, but in the new ud he kissed back.

Then we saw dialogues of SH and all I can say is, WTF SEUNGHO WHAT THE ACTUALLY FUCK. I was legit mad, sad I don't even know what to say, but I know that keeps denying those feelings of his and he tells himself that to let his body take control of the situation, then he also tells himself that THEY'RE JUST LIKE FUCK BUDDIES and like feelings ae not involved and thats the best for him, but we see, WE FUCKING SEE HIM HUGGING NAKYUM AT THE END, HIS ACTIONS ALONE PROVES THAT HE IS CONTRADICTING HIMSELF UGHH. I just can't with this new update :(( all I know is that I am sad :((.

Thanks for reading my thoughts about the new update but I think it was just me blabbering again :((. I also think that in the next update, we will read about another persons perspective, like nameless one and jihwa, sir TRASH or even NK and SHs after that night, who knows