Seems to me that instead of talking to her about that, he just wants to cheat.
Cause when she went to give him head when it was not baby-makikng time, he pushed her away. So, really, he just wants new pussy.
By that point, the relationship was already deteriorated. Honestly, it is too late now for them. No amount of communication can make sexual attraction when it disappeared completely. At the early stages, it can be fixed, but right now, no chance. And the fact that they used a code like ”salisbury steak” for ovulation day is too forced. They need to separate and find new partners. Many couples make the mistake of forcing to continue a relationship when there is nothing left, just for the sake of kids or common goods. That is how cheating begins.
If he had gotten real medical help (counseling) with her, they might have fixed it.
But he's basically bored with his wife and enjoys the cuck life, but she is uncomfortable. That he doesn't care and forces her emotionally shows this marriage is one-sided. Hers. He's given up on a real marriage and just wants kicks.
But when it comes to the grooming/conspiracy, she's not to blame. She's the prey and the predators are all around--doctor, husband, swappers....
but things are looking quite gray.
"-Why can't I get excited when I am with my wife? (him)
- Because you force yourself to have sex with her when you don't feel like it. That's why your body rejects it. (doctor)"
Basically, the wife got so into her obssesion with having a kid that sex became a chore rather than something natural for him.