taeha's expressions and the veins on his hands...this guy's been wanting her BAD what the hell
i just know when kiel finally gets asha to marry him, his next side quest is gonna be figuring out how to get asha pregnant
i wish they had babies...in the last panel of the extra, ilya said khalid kept coming outside of him....get him pregnant!!!!
calling the guy who paid for your expenses while you grew up and took care of you despite being raped by you your cumdump is insane disrespect
it would be really interesting if taekyung did try the approach heeseo suggested; sweet words which are empty lies...for a man like heeseo, that sort of thing really would go straight to his heart, especially if it's taekyung. i'm curious to see what taekyung will do
taekyung hole
so i read the novel, and it turns out og sihyeon's trash boyfriend was indeed jaeha, the blond guy from FLOW.
does anyone know the identity of the mysterious guy who og sihyeon used to 'love'? i've been rereading recently, and he's mentioned a lot in the beginning chapters, however, his existence is slowly dissipating as hajin creates new memories in sihyeon's body...who was the man who had so much control over og sihyeon? is it the blond guy from the other group? ...or isu? anyone know?
i am so, so curious about the murder plot that's happening aside from heeseo and taekyung's relationship. what was heeseo's mom and taekyung's mom's relationship? were they friends or lovers maybe? or they hated each other?! who was the man that heeseo's mom and taekyung's stepmom killed? what was his relationship to them and for what purpose was he killed? if the people affiliated with st. veronica's children's orphanage are still dying, then is taekyung's mom the one responsible? and why is she killing all these innocent people? what's the deal with the orphanage? i'm also curious as to what happened during the 7 years which heeseo was gone...who did he stay with in germany? (his father perhaps?! i am so curious as to who his dad is...if the man is even alive or not...)
i went back and i reread the beginning chapters, and throughout, i kept wondering: what are taekyung's honest thoughts on heeseo? taekyung constantly says that what he's doing is because he feels indebted to jeongae (heeseo's mom), that he knows heeseo had to grow up viewing affection as a thing to earn (much like taekyung); so taekyung lies to heeseo about liking him and says he wants his affection to be given to heeseo readily, with no terms or conditions.
but taekyung's behaviour is really...so conflicting. he seems unable to separate heeseo from the child from the burning chapel years ago; coddling him constantly and letting him get away with things saying "he's just a kid, he has separation anxiety." he constantly tells himself this, that heeseo is unstable and needs taekyung to hold his hand a little, but then he'll switch up all of a sudden and tell heeseo that he's all grown up and has to learn how to handle himself, only for heeseo to do something to make him change his mind again.
i find taekyung's behaviour so confusing because, in a way, he's at fault for turning heeseo into this person. (i am not defending heeseo's actions. i know he has his own autonomy and chose to become the person he is, i am simply stating fact.) he's the one who gives heeseo so much and then abruptly pulls it away, leaving heeseo wanting and waiting. he keeps heeseo in the dark completely about his mother's murder, saying it's not something heeseo needs to concern himself with when heeseo pries; completely disregarding the fact that heeseo has every right to know, and especially so since he's an adult. however, the truth is, taekyung wants to protect seokju by leaving heeseo in the dark. he's unable to see seokju as jeongae's murderer when she's been his stepmother all his life.
taekyung pushes heeseo away when the topic of sex is brought up, but at the same time, seems to pull him closer. (i am not excusing the fact that heeseo is a rapist, that is an entirely different matter here. i am simply saying that before the timeskip, taekyung let heeseo get away with far too much with little consequences.)
taekyung is condescending towards heeseo; reminding him constantly that taekyung is his guardian and nothing more, but then lying and telling heeseo that he likes him; causing heeseo to think otherwise. at the same time, taekyung deeply cares for heeseo; views heeseo as someone he needs to protect, keep safe, and happy. taekyung says it's because of jeongae, but is that true? haven't the lines between taekyung being heeseo's guardian because he feels indebted to jeongae and taekyung taking care of heeseo simply because he wants to, blurred?
even now, taekyung hates heeseo...but he was completely alright with playing house with him for a while, smiling like they were still stuck in that winter from 7 years ago; but he was snapped out of his daydream when he discovered the cameras in the house. even when taekyung tried escaping, he stopped when he noticed that heeseo hit his head on the rock, and even reached out with shaking hands to ensure the man was okay.
taekyung cares about heeseo, but at the same time, he's unsure. he thinks fondly of the child from 7 years ago, whom he still sees left in heeseo at times. he'd searched for heeseo during those 7 years, masturbated to him, and was even just a bit relieved to see him when he'd woken up in heeseo's house at the beginning of season 2. he doesn't love heeseo, doesn't trust him, but holds a firm belief that heeseo would never hurt him.
he cannot comprehend heeseo's like; doesn't understand what it means for heeseo to like him. 7 years ago, and even now, taekyung does not understand it. he doesn't understand romance as a whole.
what i still can't figure out is, why exactly did taekyung lie to heeseo about liking him? to keep heeseo obedient? if so, then for what purpose? if anything, taekyung's lie only made heeseo worse. then again, if he told heeseo otherwise, heeseo may have done something dramatic or threatened suicide again.
but...taekyung couldn't handle heeseo avoiding him when he'd told heeseo how he knew heeseo's mother; taekyung is also very attached to heeseo. it's this codependency that keeps them together.
heeseo likes taekyung to the point that if he can't be with taekyung, he doesn't want it any other way. taekyung feels obligated to care for heeseo, to look after and provide for him.
but why? why are taekyung's feelings like this? i'm so curious about his true thoughts, because he truly is such an unreliable narrator...
i like how attentive the author is in changing his necklace/bracelet every chapter. for e.g) so far he's worn: diamond encrusted cross necklace (brand unknown), louis vuitton lock necklace, vintage alhambra van cleef pendant in malachite, bulgari serpenti forever bracelet, and another van cleef i haven't been able to recognize. but yes, you can tell his parents are definitely wealthy and the author is very specific about showing off their tax bracket through ipsae's jewelry haha
born to be a school life shounen ai mc with jaewon, forced to be the love interest of an obsessive mr. kwon in a psychological yaoi...
if i were heeseo i would just let taekyung cut himself up...do you think he'd actually do anything to truly harm himself if only you were a little brighter, mr. kwon.
i don't know how far-fetched this may sound; but i truly do believe heeseo has an oedipus complex which he's fulfilling by using taekyung...