
As the eldest, it's really difficult to prioritise yourself bc you kinda have this feeling that it's selfish if you do. And you feel guilty. Idk if it's an innate nature of older siblings but most I've known share the same sentiment as mine. Don't get me wrong tho. My parents aren't toxic and I wasn't exactly faced with limited choices but ofc, life can be unfair..so you have to take charge when stuff happens.
I can't explain it well but it's that. ( ̄∇ ̄")
I wish you happiness, Cirrus.